


bloom

by kinkykenjirou



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Futakuchi Kenji for like 5 seconds, Futakuchi Kenji/Shirabu Kenjirou - Freeform, Getting Together, Hanahaki Disease, Implied Ushijima Wakatoshi/Oikawa Tooru - Freeform, Iwachan thinks Semi is pretty owo, Iwaizumi's Parents - Freeform, M/M, Matsukawa Issei/Hanamaki Takahiro - Freeform, One-Sided Love, Seijoh and Shiratorizawa friendship uwu, Semi and Iwaizumi are in the same team!, Semi's Parents - Freeform, Unrequited Love, futakuchi yahaba kyouken and watari make their appearance, implied Moniwa Kaname/Sasaya Takehito/Kamasaki Yasushi, iwasemi endgame uwu, moniwa is still distressed bc of Futakuchi lmao save him, seijohrizawa ft dateko friendship, semi and iwachan with dyed hairs yayyy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-21
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-04-05 13:24:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14045169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinkykenjirou/pseuds/kinkykenjirou
Summary: can i be close to you?***Eita knew what those flowers meant, and in his unfortunate predicament, he just wished he hadn't.





	1. cherry blossoms

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, idk what's wrong with me but I kept on thinking about unrequited love between Semi and Shirabu and I'm crying bc it pains me. Anyway, I've done a little tinkering and may have put a little changes here and there in Hanahaki Disease. This was supposed to be a one-shot but I want a happy ending for everyone, and decided to draw it out. Let Semi have his happy ending. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy! Tell me what you think in the comments or hmu in twitter, @EITADAKIMASU (i changed my username bc twitter was suspending accounts and i didn't want mine to be suspended). Love you all!

The first time flowers spilled out from Eita’s mouth was when he saw Shirabu playing for the first time as the starting setter of their team, in the Inter-High during his third and last year at Shiratorizawa. He kept denying and setting it aside, the tightness in his chest and the fluttering in his stomach whenever his eyes are drawn to Shirabu, saw the glint of determination in his caramel-brown orbs, exchange haughty and sneering remarks between the two of them, and his unwavering perseverance.

 

He knew what those flowers meant. He saw so much spill from Tendou’s mouth that they could make a garden out of it in their dorm room. Not that Tendou could keep it long enough for him not to notice his energy dwindling, hand fisting to smother a cough, petals suddenly appearing here and there in the mornings, skin paling even more so than it originally is.

 

“Who is it?” Eita asked one day when he saw Tendou hunched over the toilet in their bathroom at 3 AM, chest heaving with each intake of breath as cough after cough racked his body, a fresh wave of flowers spilling from his mouth. Before Tendou could even answer, a cough made its way from his body once more, along with a few red roses. Perhaps, even thinking of the person he is in love with is enough to cause the onslaught of flowers and cough.

 

“Wakatoshi.” Tendou said, voice hoarse and but a whisper, Eita was surprised he was able to hear it.

 

“How long?”

 

Tendou shrugged, “Been in love with him since our second year but the coughing started just two months ago."

 

Eita thought back on what happened two months ago, trying to look at the signs that caused Tendou to have this unfortunate disease laid out on him. He thought he and Ushijima are doing great in their relationship, but it seems that it may not have been the case, not when Tendou is coughing up flowers of unrequited love in their bathroom at the ungodly hour of 3AM.

 

“It was when Wakatoshi finally asked Oikawa out, and fortunately for them, it went well. Until they scheduled yet another date, and then another, and another until they were officially dating.”

 

“I thought the two of you had something.”

 

“We didn’t. I was just helping him out.”  Tendou leaned his forehead on the toilet, closing his eyes as he tried to even out his breathing, “As if it made anything better, I just prolonged my agony. I knew it wouldn’t lead to anything more, our friendship, but, well. I guess it’s just me being stupid and letting the rush of feelings and emotions take over me.”

Eita sighed and stepped inside the bathroom, helping Tendou stand up and bringing him to his bed, offering a bottle of water before slipping in beside him with the red-head snuggling in close. Eita felt wetness on his shoulder, but didn’t speak a word about it, instead he just his best friend closer and squeezed his shoulder lightly.

 

Months later in the Inter High, as the excitement of winning settled down, Eita rushed into their dorm room, not bothering to take off his shoes and turning on the lights as he ran to the bathroom and hunched over the sink. Cough after cough spewed from his mouth, blue, violet and pink flowers spilling forth and littering the sink, until it overflowed and spilled onto the tiled bathroom floor. Once the coughing died down, he sat on the bathroom floor as his knees gave out, dazed. He didn’t even notice the tears that spilled from his eyes as he stared at the multitude of flowers in front of him. Colorful, vibrant, and beautiful, an opposite to what he is feeling right now.

 

Tendou and Kawanishi came in later, their laughter filling in the silence, saw Eita unmoving in the bathroom, surrounded by flowers, and they both shared a knowing look before helping him up and escorting him to his own bed.

 

It remained an unspoken secret between the three of them, and not once did Tendou nor Kawanishi asked who it was. Maybe because they knew who it was. Or maybe because they were just waiting for the right time to question him about it.

 

“Why don’t you tell him about it already?” Tendou asked as he caressed Eita’s back softly, holding a bottle of water with his other hand as they sat on the ashen-haired boy’s bed. A knock was heard from their door and Tendou stood up to open it, Kawanishi slipping in before the door was closed once again and the two made his way towards him. “I’m sorry I took long in coming, Kenjirou woke up and asked me where I was headed.” Kawanishi said as he sat down on Eita’s bed, and at the mention of his roommate slash best friend, a new wave of flowers spilled from Eita.

 

“Why would I tell him? As if it would do me any good.” Another coughing fit, baby blue colored flowers falling from his mouth. “Ah, fuck.” Eita said, leaning back on the propped up pillows Tendou placed behind him.

 

“Who knows? Kenjirou might even return your feelings.” Tendou said, his voice lacking its usual confidence, which made Eita scoff. “He won’t.”

 

“You don’t know that!”

 

“He won’t, Satori. Drop it.”

 

“But—”

 

“I hate to admit it, but Semi-san is right.” Kawanishi said from his place by Eita’s feet. Tendou looked at his boyfriend questioningly and maybe a hint of desperation. He doesn’t want his best friend to get worse than he is right now. “Kenjirou already has a boyfriend.”

 

The room was struck silent by Kawanishi’s revelation, the only sound remaining was Eita’s violent coughing fit which didn’t stop for long that he had to get out of bed and move into the bathroom, leaving his bed a mess of pink cherry blossoms, the color of spring, the season of hope and new beginnings. The season when Shirabu Kenjirou was born.

 

“Take the surgery, Eita.” Tendou said while they helped him back to his bed, Kawanishi brushing off the petals and letting them fall to the floor.

 

“Hell, no. We would graduate from high school soon and I won’t get to see him in college. It would pass.” He said, voice weak. Tendou and Kawanishi shared a look and sighed. “You know it doesn’t work that way, Eita.”

 

“Who knows? It might work on me.” Eita said stubbornly and wrapped himself in blankets, turning his back on his two friends. Tendou was about to say something when Kawanishi placed a hand on his shoulder and shook his head. Eita is a stubborn man and apparently, both Kawanishi and Tendou wouldn’t be able to convince him enough to take the surgery, not like how Kawanishi convinced Tendou to take one as it was the only viable option left. It was clear that Ushijima was so whipped with Oikawa, and Kawanishi saw Tendou suffer so much, he didn’t stop bugging him to take the surgery. Tendou took him up on that offer and Kawanishi, along with Eita, never strayed from his side since then.

 

With a sigh, Tendou turned around and headed to his bed adjacent Eita’s and plopped down, Kawanishi following suit and nuzzling into his chest. The room remained silent, save for Eita’s coughing and sniffles. Kawanishi can feel Tendou flinch at every cough that falls from Eita’s mouth, which prompted him to adjust their positions, making Tendou face him and covering the red-head's ears with his hands to block out the sound of Eita’s coughing.

 

It was one thing for Tendou to have the disease himself, and it was another thing to see his best friend go through and suffer through the same misfortune he once had. And it was hurting him.

 

“It’s not your fault alright? Stop.” Kawanishi said as he looked into red-brown eyes filled with unshed tears. “Don’t blame yourself for not noticing earlier as well. Semi-san was in denial, that much was obvious. He kept it in wraps until he couldn’t anymore, not with the flowers, not with the coughing. You were ridden by the disease itself as well, he wouldn’t blame you. So, stop.”

 

Tendou sighed shakily as tears flowed from his eyes, and Kawanishi wiped them away with his thumbs before placing a chaste kiss on his forehead and lips. He was lucky that he got someone as patient as Kawanishi to be with him. Tendou was glad he took the surgery. He just wished Eita would find someone that could help him deal with the disease and maybe even change his mind about taking the operation. He wouldn’t want his best friend dying.

 

Spring High rolled around and the lose didn’t press down the pain in Eita’s chest. It only heightened, seeing Shirabu cry and blame himself for something that wasn’t entirely his fault. They were strong, Shiratorizawa always had been. But at that time, Karasuno was stronger, and the stronger ones are those who get to stay on the court and fight. Unfortunately, it wasn’t them who was meant to stay on the court this time and head to nationals.

 

The third years retired and focused on getting their school works done, as well as college applications. Ushijima would continue playing, that much was obvious. Yamagata and Oohira would as well, a university in Osaka offered them volleyball scholarships and they accepted. Tendou would stop playing and Eita was pondering if he would too, seeing as no university would offer a scholarship from a non-regular setter. In which Washijo proved him wrong, because just because his play style did not match that of Shiratorizawa’s doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be what university teams wanted. Washijo put in a good name for him as a recommendation and a university in Tokyo, the same one that Tendou applied to, offered him a volleyball scholarship. And he accepted, worked his ass hard enough to prepare himself for college (he was in Class 1 and thus, was not offered college prep subjects), and despite the frequent coughs racking his body (it didn’t stop, not when he get to see Shirabu once in a while because the second year suddenly sought him out for a few advices on serving), it was a good distraction.

 

Graduation came by and Eita was glad the last-minute hard work paid off.  His grades were good enough, and his stuff were ready. He was set to go to Tokyo. And he couldn’t be any happier. Maybe he could finally breath.

 

Once the ceremony was over, he and the other third years from the volleyball team were greeted by their younger members, and Eita had to hold in a cough when he saw Shirabu in their midst. Of course, he would be there.

 

Goshiki was crying, and Oohira consoled the young ace. Tendou and Kawanishi started making out, and Yamagata had to pull them apart because they were blocking the way, which prompted the team to move and go to a less crowded place where they can properly hold a conversation without being a hindrance to others.

 

Eita slinked off and went to the gym, thinking he was alone and his slipping off went unnoticed, not until he heard a cough behind him, and turned to see Shirabu standing there.

 

The afternoon light did well in highlighting his hair and youthful features. He is beautiful, and Eita’s chest hurt, from the sight before him and from holding in the awaiting onslaught of flowers coupled with the violent fits of cough.

 

“What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be with the team?” Eita said as he turned back around and swept his gaze across the gym, a gym he knew so well and spent most of his three years in. He would be missing it. 

 

“Shouldn’t you be there as well?” Shirabu asked as he stood beside Eita, not close enough that could make either of them uncomfortable nor far enough that Eita can’t feel his warmth. Eita just shrugged. They remained in silence until Shirabu let out a sigh, “I know our relationship is rocky,” he started which earned him a huff from Eita, “and I’m not the best kouhai, but I wanted to thank you personally. For all the advices on setting and all.”

 

Eita looked at him with a raised eyebrow, “Why are you thanking me?”

 

“Can’t I be a nice kouhai?” Shirabu said with an eyeroll.

 

“You’re far from nice.” Eita pointed out which earned him a pout from the younger setter before a small smile bloomed on his face. That smile just made his chest hurt even more. “I mean it, though. You’re not a bad senpai, not in the least.”

 

They just stared at each other for a while before Eita broke it, “You’re not so bad as well, I guess. Good luck with the captaincy.”

 

Eita didn’t miss the good-natured grin that appeared on Shirabu’s face, far from the haughty and sarcastic ones he received from the past two years, “Thank you. Good luck with college. Washijo-sensei mentioned you got a volleyball scholarship. Hope your ass doesn’t warm the benches this time around.” Shirabu said with a small laugh which made Eita roll his eyes and mess up his perfectly-styled and immaculate hair. (Eita didn’t know what prompted him to do that, maybe it was Shirabu’s teasing comment or maybe he just wanted to feel how soft it was between his fingertips. He found out it was indeed as soft as it looks, and Eita wanted to run his fingers through it, but stopped because he didn’t want another coughing fit, not right now in front of the person he is in love with.)

 

“You’re such a brat.” Eita said, tone laced with affection. “Thank you.”

 

Shirabu nodded, “I should be going. I need to say my thanks and good byes with the other senpais and I would be meeting up with Kenji after. See you around, Semi-san.” And he was gone. Eita was left alone standing in the gym, cherry blossoms littering the ground by his feet and an undeniable ache in his chest.


	2. yellow summer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eita's flowers are pink, the color of cherry blossoms in the spring. With the addition of a new, yet familiar face in his life came the addition of yellow flowers, the color of summer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who said semi is the only one in pain? uwu
> 
> and cue: iwaizumi hajime, oikawa tooru and ushijima wakatoshi. (and some more kawaten moments because i just love them)

Tokyo was nice, if a little fast-paced as compared to the chill and relaxing pace in Sendai, but Eita won’t mind, not when he gets to distance himself from Shirabu and save himself from his misery, even if just a little.

He got to room with Tendou, as they requested from the university housing director. His coughing didn’t stop, he was still spewing cherry blossoms here and there, but it was much easier to control it this time around as compared to when he sees Shirabu every now and then.

Kawanishi went down to Tokyo for a week during the vacation after they settled in and stayed with them, roaming around the streets of Tokyo during the day and night, taking a tour of their university, and discovering the good places to eat that wouldn’t hurt their wallets too much.

 

“Hey, Taichi.” Eita called before he boarded the train going back to Sendai. The tall brunet turned to him with a hum and Eita handed him an average-sized package. Kawanishi took it from him and looked at him questioningly. “For Shirabu. His birthday is coming up right?” He whispered, adverting his gaze and swallowing hard to stop the flowers from spilling.  Kawanishi just offered another hum in reply, “Don’t I get a birthday gift too? I celebrated mine before him.” Eita just rolled his eyes, “We treated you enough here already, I’m going to bust a hole in my wallet if not for my mother sending allowance and me starting my part-time job next week.” Kawanishi laughed at Eita’s statement, and then they heard the announcement that his train is now arriving at the platform. “Okay, I’ll be sure to give this to him.” He said, gesturing to the package. Eita nodded his thanks and went off to give Tendou and Kawanishi the privacy they needed to say their goodbyes to one another. He took the small time he had alone to cough up the cherry blossoms that built up in his lungs from the mention of Shirabu.

 

He looked at the pink petals on his palm, huffed and crushed them before placing his hands back in the pocket of his hoodie. Tendou sidled up with him not too long and studied Eita before asking, “Ready to go?” to which Eita just nodded as they walked together back to the university dorms.

 

The air’s turning warmer and the spring season is already giving way to summer. Eita just hopes that his feelings would fade away soon as well. He knows it wouldn't. 

 

 

School started soon and Eita tried his best to wake up early, which he was successfully not able to do. Tendou was no better either. They had the same start of classes at 8am though with different majors as Tendou decided to take Literature and Eita took Photography. They were moving fast around their room, trying to shove the other away from the bathroom in order to go first (Eita had to use the communal showers in order to not get later than he already is) and rushed out of the dorm room with his hair in disarray and shoelaces not tied properly. He was glad that volleyball morning practices didn’t start for yet another week or he would be screwed.

When he got to the study hall, the professor was just briefing the class with the course subject and the requirements needed and he sighed in relief knowing he didn’t miss much of the course lectures. He settled on an empty seat by the door, silently putting his bag down so as not to disrupt the class with unnecessary noises.  He ran his fingers through his mussed-up hair and took his notebook out from his bag, noticing the lack of his camera which made him curse under his breath, prompting the man seated beside him to look at him questioningly.

 

Eita looked up and was met by a familiar face. “I, uh, forgot to bring my camera.” He explained, frustration evident in the way his eyebrows scrunched.

 

“Oh, you can share mine. Though I doubt sensei would require us to use one right now, seeing as she just wants to go over all course requirements. But if it happens that she would make us use one, then I’d be happy to share mine with you,” his seatmate said.

 

“Um, thank you.” He said and shuffled in his seat to face front but turned back to the person beside him. “You’re uh, Seijoh’s ace right?” He asked. The man hummed and turned to him, “Yeah. Iwaizumi Hajime. Your Shiratorizawa’s former setter right?” Iwaizumi asked. And Eita struggled to maintain his composure and not let his mind wander off to a pretty, youthful face, determined caramel eyes, soft copper-brown hair and slender fingers that toss the ball wonderfully so he won’t be coughing uncontrollably.

 

“Yeah, that’s me. Semi Eita by the way,” Eita said, holding his hand out to which Iwaizumi took and shook lightly, offering a small smile which Eita returned. They let go and turned back to look in front, conversation on-hold as they listened to the professor laying out course details.

 

 

“Photography, huh?” Eita said as he and Iwaizumi sat down together for lunch in the cafeteria. The food wasn’t good, but it would do seeing as they don’t have much time left before they go to their next class in which they were classmates as well.

 

Iwaizumi shrugged, “I like taking photos. It makes me calm. Besides, I’m not interested in many things besides photography and volleyball.”

 

“Speaking of volleyball, are you here on a scholarship?” Eita asked, seeing as this university also holds a good volleyball team besides the programs they offer.

 

“I am, yeah. You?”

 

“Yeah. Washijo put in a good word for me. Didn’t think he’d do that after, you know.” Eita said and Iwaizumi nodded in understanding. “Well, it seems like we’d be together more often than I thought, even be playing in the same side of the net as opposed to before.”

 

Eita looked up from his food and saw a good-natured grin on Iwaizumi’s face which he mirrored. “Yeah.”

 

 

Being with Iwaizumi was far from awkward. It was nice to be around someone as laid back as Seijoh’s former ace, and he was easy to get along with. Tendou is his best friend sure, but Tendou is sometimes too energetic for him that he gets tired easily. Being with Iwaizumi was a change of pace. It was comfortable and they hit it off instantly, which was nice considering that the two of them have the same schedule of classes, and would be playing together in the volleyball team as the setter and wing spiker.

 

“You two are so alike. It feels like I have two mothers scolding me.” Tendou said when he got sick once and both Eita and Iwaizumi had to take care of him. It took only days after Eita met Iwaizumi that Tendou met him as well, and they hit it off good, too. And now Iwaizumi is in their dorm room, washing dishes on their sink while Eita scolds Tendou for not taking care of himself once again.

 

“Well, someone has to be the grown-up here and look after you.” Eita sassed at him making Tendou pout but it soon disappeared as a grin made its way to his face. “Eita-kun~ Are you my mom?” Eita rolled his eyes and hit Tendou with a pillow, making the redhead snicker before letting out a sneeze. “Shut up and sleep, Satori. Taichi would be coming over tomorrow to take care of your sick ass.” Tendou gave out a huff of amusement and turned to his side, hugging his pillow into his chest and breaking out in snores not too long.

 

Eita looked at Iwaizumi who was washing the dishes in their room, and he didn’t miss the way Iwaizumi’s shoulders are tense, nor the cough that made its way from his throat while Eita was hitting Tendou with the pillow. The redhead’s snickers weren’t that loud to cover it up.

 

 

Whenever Kawanishi comes over during the weekends, Eita would retreat to Iwaizumi’s dorm room (which was just a few doors down from his and Tendou’s) and was more than welcome to stay for as long as he needs. Eita took him up on that offer as he didn’t want to be an audience to Tendou and Kawanishi’s sickeningly sweet gestures. He met another former player from Miyagi, Dateko’s old captain, Moniwa Kaname who was rooming with Iwaizumi, whom he got along with well, too.

Sometimes the three of them would lounge around lazily in the dorm room, sometimes even go out to eat ramen at the place where Eita is taking his part-time job scheduled during Wednesdays and Fridays, and sometimes they would be left with their own devices, Moniwa doing his chemistry work and Eita and Iwaizumi going out together to take photos for their major subject.

 

 

Eita didn’t notice Iwaizumi’s tensed stance nor heard the poorly-disguised coughs again not until they had their scheduled practice match with the university Oikawa and Ushijima are attending.

 

“Iwa-chaaaaaan!” was the only warning they have gotten before a body slammed into Iwaizumi, making the raven lose his balance and would have fallen if not for Eita’s hand coming up to steady him.

 

“Careful, Shittykawa.” Iwaizumi grumbled as he righted himself and Oikawa released him from the hug, offering a pout at the nickname before it dissolved into a bright grin, Eita thought he might need sunglasses from how blinding it was.

 

“How are you, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asked and Iwaizumi answered “fine,” at the same time Ushijima appeared by Oikawa’s side and placed a kiss on the brunet’s temple before acknowledging the two. “Hello, Iwaizumi, Semi. It’s nice seeing you again.”

 

Eita offered a smile, “Nice to see you too, Wakatoshi.”

 

“I take it you and Tendou have been doing well?”

 

“We are, thanks. Satori would come by to watch in a few. He just has to finish his last class for the day.”

 

“Oh, oh, oh! Tendou-chan is coming?!” Oikawa said clapping his hands eagerly. Eita thought he looked like a kid that was about to be given his candies, “That’s great! I have to thank him for a lot of things, especially because he was one of the reasons Waka-chan and I are where we are right now.”

 

Oikawa’s eyes are glowing with affection for the former ace of Shiratorizawa, and Eita didn’t miss the way Ushijima looked at Oikawa as well. Nor did Eita miss the rigid form of Iwaizumi standing beside him.

 

“Well, I’ll tell him to go find you after the match.” Eita said offering a smile to both Oikawa and Ushijima. “Excuse us, we need to get changed. Wouldn’t want coach to be shouting for us to get our asses in gear.”

 

Oikawa laughed and waved his hand, “Sure, sure. Go on, Semi-chan. We’d be catching you two later!” Eita grinned at them and took Iwaizumi’s hand before pulling him towards the locker rooms. He let go when they were alone and started to take his and Iwaizumi’s jersey out of their respective bags.

 

“Here.” Eita said as he handed Iwaizumi’s jersey to him. Iwaizumi took the jersey from Eita’s hand but didn’t get changed yet, just staring down at the white and blue clothing in his hands. Eita finished first and patted Iwaizumi on the shoulder before leaving the locker rooms to give him privacy.

 

Iwaizumi emerged from the locker rooms calm and collected, the tenseness gone from his shoulders. Two other players from Oikawa and Ushijima’s team came up to him and had him in headlock, a playful and friendly gesture between the three of them, before they were called back to their respective teams and the match started.

 

Both Eita and Iwaizumi earned their positions as starters in the team which made Eita feel elated once he knew. He missed playing on the court, and maybe this time he could really, really show what he is as a setter. Hours of practice with the team and extended spiking practice between him and Iwaizumi paid off when they won a match out of the three they had. Granted, Ushijima was still powerful as ever, and Oikawa was still a troublesome setter and a good all-around player.

 

After the match ended and they got changed into their street clothes, Eita noticed Iwaizumi’s heavy than normal breathing and pale complexion. They had to excuse themselves from the dinner that Oikawa, Hanamaki and Matsukawa offered to take them to, and instead went back to the dorms.

 

“Call me if you need anything. Moniwa is staying at Sasaya’s tonight to work on their laboratory assignment.” Eita said as he opened the door to Iwaizumi and Moniwa’s room. Iwaizumi nodded and dropped his bag by his bed before slipping into the bathroom and Eita headed out.

 

He didn’t miss the violent coughing fit that echoed from inside Iwaizumi’s room, nor the petal that seemed to have made its way in his gym bag while he was unpacking his stuff, a color different from the flowers that spilled from his mouth, which were blues and violets and mostly pinks, the color of spring. This was yellow, and yellow was the color of flowers during summer.


	3. fallen leaves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You two are so alike.” He remembered Tendou telling him, and maybe they were. In so many ways. Maybe it was one of the reasons why being with Iwaizumi was as easy and natural as breathing. 
> 
> * 
> 
> yellow and pink mix, as well as thoughts regarding the objects of their unrequited love. are they worth it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's the third chapter~ enjoy!

Eita observed and watched over Iwaizumi subtly whenever they were together. He knows Iwaizumi is keeping something and though he might have an inkling of what it may be, and Moniwa even knowing what it is, he decided not to pry, seeing as Iwaizumi was intent on keeping the matter to himself. And Eita knows they weren’t in that level of friendship and trust yet that Iwaizumi would reveal something so confidential and personal, not when they just met and became friends in college.

 

 

On some days, Iwaizumi was fine. On some, he was better. And on some, he’s worse with eyebags under his eyes and complexion paler than normal. He would constantly go to the bathroom or if not, he would be on his desk asleep as the professor rattled on about lectures. He was unusually lethargic during volleyball practice, and he almost fainted once because his body was tired and decided to fail him. Iwaizumi kept insisting he was fine. Eita was having none of it. If it means dragging a stubborn Iwaizumi back to the dorms, then so be it.

 

“I told you I’m fine.” Iwaizumi grumbled as he was dragged along by Eita inside his dorm room.

 

“And I told you that I’m not buying that bullshit. Your eyes look like they have grown from eyebags, not the other way around. You are sickly pale, and you do nothing but sleep during classes, along with downing an ungodly amount of coffee during breaks instead of eating real food. You’re an athlete, Iwaizumi. And even without that fact, you still need to take care of your body.” Eita said, making Iwaizumi sigh and just plop down on his bed.

 

“Tendou was right. I feel like being scolded by a mother right now.” He said, and Eita huffed, “You’re just as bad at mothering people yourself.”

 

“True, but it feels good to be at the receiving end of mothering for once.”

 

Eita just rolled his eyes and helped Iwaizumi settle into the bed, placing a bottle of water by his night stand along with some meds for when he goes down with a headache.

 

“Call me when you need something, alright? I’ll be back after practice.” Eita said and Iwaizumi nodded sleepily.

 

Iwaizumi was slightly better after the rest Eita put him to. He looked better and even more alive than he did before. He was practically a walking zombie with all those coffee and eyebags. He started to catch up on lessons he missed and tasks that he started late. Finals were coming and they both needed to finish things up if they don’t want to cram and half-ass their projects.

 

They continued to stay late for extended practice. 30 minutes spent in practicing their serves (they get better and better at controlling the ball) and the next hour would be spent in spiking practice. Eita can see the elation and the stress wearing off from Iwaizumi’s face every time he gets a clean serve and spike in, and he was glad he was doing better.

 

Which didn’t last because apparently, a surprise practice match was held between their university and Ushijima’s and it meant seeing Oikawa again. Not that Eita is against it, but with Iwaizumi’s case, he thinks that it wouldn’t do the man any good.

 

“You’re far more attentive today with Iwaizumi. If I didn’t know you are so whipped with Kenjirou that you were spouting flowers every time he is mentioned, I would say you like him.” Tendou said as he sat down beside Eita, who, with the mention of Shirabu’s name, coughed out pink cherry blossoms which he discreetly crushed and threw to the trash bin. “I’m just looking out for him. That’s all.”

 

Tendou just hummed before perking up, “Ah, by the way, Taichi’s coming over again this weekend and he wants to go watch a movie. Want to come with?”

 

“Yeah, sure.” He said, shrugging before turning to go back to the court when the coach calls for them to start the match.

 

It ended earlier than was planned to because Iwaizumi wasn’t feeling well, and like before, he almost fainted.

 

“Iwa-chan!” Oikawa exclaimed, coming from the other side of the net as Iwaizumi stumbled to his feet, Eita helping him. “Are you okay? You look pale. You haven’t been feeling better are you? Iwa-chan—”

 

“Stop, I’m fine. Let’s continue the match.” He said. The coach looked at him with hesitation because it was clear that Iwaizumi was anything but fine.

 

“Iwaizumi, I think you should rest.” Ushijima said. “It is not good for you to strain your body.”

 

“I’m good, Ushiwaka.”

 

“You’re not, Iwa-chan! Look, even Semi-chan needs to hold you up because you can’t stand on your own without wobbling. Take a break and take a rest, Hajime. Please.”

 

“I said I’m fine—” Iwaizumi started to protest but was stopped as a violent coughing fit racked his body and Eita needed to hold him close as Iwaizumi went down on his knees, trying so hard to stifle the coughs and stop the flowers from spilling but ended up failing. Eita knew Iwaizumi didn’t want anyone to know, maybe not even Oikawa, and that was what prompted him to hold the raven close to his chest as cough after cough was released from his body. Tendou understood what was happening and immediately rushed to their side, trying to cover as much flowers as he could.

 

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asked trying to go nearer but Eita’s voice stopped him. “Get my phone and call Moniwa. Now.” His tone left no room for arguments and Oikawa and Ushijima just followed through. The coaches herded their respective teams to the side of the gym, stopping the practice and scheduling for just another time.

 

Iwaizumi remained on the gym floor kneeling and clutching hard at the material of Eita’s jersey, heaving in deep breaths. Tendou was trying to sweep the yellow flowers in an organized pile and shoving it in his bag quickly. The two players from Oikawa’s team, Hanamaki and Matsukawa, offered their help. Handing a bottle of water silently to Iwaizumi and helping Tendou take the flowers away. A nod from both signaled Eita that they knew about Iwaizumi’s disease.

 

“I’m taking Iwaizumi back to our room. Call Moniwa as soon as Wakatoshi comes back with my phone.” Eita told Tendou as he helped Iwaizumi stand up after his coughing died down. Tendou nodded and Eita offered his thanks before ushering Iwaizumi out of the gym and towards the dorms.

 

 

“Hanahaki, huh.” Eita asked, more like stated, when another wave of flowers spilled from Iwaizumi’s mouth.

 

“Unfortunately, yes.” Iwaizumi answered, leaning his head back on the wall.

 

“Since towards the end of our second year?”

 

“Yeah. How’d you know?” Iwaizumi asked, glancing at Eita from the corner of his eyes.

 

“Satori had them. After Wakatoshi and Oikawa started dating. Figured it would be the same time that you would acquire it.”

 

“How’d you know it was Oikawa?” Another wave of yellow flowers. It was beautiful, the flowers, Eita thought, if not for what they signify.

 

Eita hummed in thought, “At first, I wasn’t so sure, but it didn’t take me long to see how you reacted when you saw him again during our first practice match with their university. After that, it was hard to ignore how you spiraled down. What happened today just confirmed everything. You’re in love with Oikawa Tooru, but he is in love with Ushijima Wakatoshi.” And it was a fact that not even Tendou, nor Iwaizumi could deny. It was as clear as day, that Ushijima and Oikawa are in love and happy together. Iwaizumi doesn’t fit anywhere in the equation. It was the painful truth punctuated by the ache in Iwaizumi’s chest and the lack of oxygen he feels in his lungs.

 

“How did Tendou survive? He seemed okay around Ushijima.”

 

“He took the surgery. His boyfriend, Taichi, prompted him to do it and they’ve been together ever since.” Iwaizumi hummed in reply. Eita turned to look at him, “Do you ever think of getting a surgery to get rid of that?”

 

“Hanamaki and Matsukawa kept on convincing me but I turn them down every time. We were graduating soon, and the time and space with Oikawa might help alleviate the problem even just a little, but it seemed that it is not the case. Figured I’d just die along with my feelings, you know?” Iwaizumi answered which earned him a shove on the shoulder from Eita at the mention of death. He let out a laugh before coughs spewed from his lips along with the yellow flowers. By now, Eita’s bed is more yellow than its usual blue beddings.

 

“Is it worth it, though?” Eita whispered as he stared on the blank space on the wall opposite where he and Iwaizumi is leaning on.

 

“I.. I don’t know anymore.” Iwaizumi said with a sigh as he leaned against Eita, tiredness making his body numb and jelly. Silence descended upon them, broken off by Iwaizumi’s occasional coughing which later on turned to soft snores as he fell asleep on Eita’s shoulder.

 

Eita was lost among his thoughts as well, his own coughing fit snapping him out of it. He needed to get Iwaizumi off his shoulder and lay him down on the bed properly before his coughing gets violent that it would wake the raven up. As he stared on the pink cherry blossoms on his floor, he ponders, _Is he worth it?_

 

 

Moniwa and Tendou came in later with their gym bags that Eita was not able to get due to needing to get Iwaizumi somewhere private as soon as possible. With thanks, he took the bags from them and laid it by the foot of his bed. Moniwa went to stand by Eita’s bed as he listened to what had transpired earlier in the gym.

 

“I found about his disease about 1 to 2 weeks after I moved here in Tokyo. He was still settling in when I arrived, and well, Oikawa was around most of the time as well, helping him along with their two other friends, Matsukawa and Hanamaki. Matsukawa asked a favor and told me to look after Iwaizumi, and I just said fine, because we’re roommates right, and it was what we would be doing in the future I guess. Iwaizumi was alright, but then when I came home one night after going out for drinks with Kamasaki and Takehito, I found him in our shared bathroom and there were yellow flowers everywhere.” Moniwa said, glancing at Eita to see if he was listening and the ashen-haired man just nodded at him to continue.

 

“I knew what those flowers meant. Kamasaki had them before he took the surgery to get rid of the disease. I didn’t ask him about it, just helped him get his rest. The next morning, he told me about how it all started. I was shocked, to say the least, to find out that Ushiwaka and Oikawa are dating for about a year or two. I thought it was Iwaizumi and Oikawa all along, you know? They were perfect, everyone thought they were the real deal. But some things are just not meant to be, I guess.

 

“Iwaizumi told me to keep it a secret, and I did. He tried to avoid all things Oikawa Tooru and I can tell he was struggling between not wanting to talk to him and talking to him. Oikawa checks on him once in a while, it didn’t help lessen the coughing no matter how much he tried. That’s why when you two became friends, I was glad you know? Someone could check up and look after him more than I could. The coughs lessened, Semi. I can say that the two of you being friends was something good for him. Oikawa was but a name, hidden in the deepest part of his being, until well, the first practice match.

 

“He got worse after that, I knew you would notice. You’re very perceptive. And I kept on convincing him to take the surgery but he is very stubborn. He wouldn’t want to. Said he’s fine when he’s far from it.”

 

The three of them remained silent after Moniwa finished speaking. Iwaizumi would cough in between minutes and new sets of yellow flowers would decorate Eita’s bed. Eita didn’t know what to say. He wanted to convince Iwaizumi to take the surgery. It was the only way, but he wasn’t one to talk. Not when he is just as stubborn and hard-headed as the raven. He wouldn’t want to take the surgery either. Afraid that he might lose more than what he just wishes to. He wants his feelings towards Shirabu to fade, but he doesn’t want to lose the blissful feeling of falling in love with someone who was meant to fall in love with him as well. He wouldn’t risk doing so.

 

_“You two are so alike.”_ He remembered Tendou telling him, and maybe they were. In so many ways. Maybe it was one of the reasons why being with Iwaizumi was as easy and natural as breathing.

 

 

Moniwa left a little later to allow Tendou and Eita to rest. He was about to wake Iwaizumi up when Eita stopped him, saying that it’s okay to let Iwaizumi stay the night as he didn’t want to bother his peaceful sleep. Moniwa nodded and said his thanks before retiring to his own dorm room. Eita, along with Tendou’s assistance, helped to get Iwaizumi’s shirt changed as he might catch a cold because of the sweat that dried off.

 

“Hey, Eita.” Tendou called as he leaned by the bathroom door. Eita looked at him through the mirror, raising an eyebrow in question as he continued to brush his teeth. “Why don’t you take the surgery with Iwaizumi?”

 

He spit the toothpaste and washed the foam from his mouth before turning to Tendou to answer, “We’ve been through this, Satori. I am not taking the surgery. I don’t know what Iwaizumi’s reason is for not taking it as well, but I sure won’t. I’m not risking it.”

 

“It’s not helping you either and you know it. I like Kenjirou and he’s my kouhai and he is Taichi’s best friend and all, but is he even worth all of these?” Tendou said while looking intently at Eita, the latter adverting his gaze, not knowing what to say. Tendou just sighed and turned to walk towards his bed.

 

Eita stood for a moment in the bathroom to ponder about Tendou’s words before turning off the lights and slipping in next to Iwaizumi on his bed.

 

 

_Is Shirabu even worth all of it?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so some of you may be wondering why iwaizumi's flowers are yellow. i mentioned in chapter 2 that yellow is the color of summer and it has something to do with oikawa as he was born in july during summer season in japan. i decided to determine the colors of the flowers they would be spewing for their loved ones as a representation of the month they were born. (shirabu-may-spring thus the pink and sometimes blue and purple flowers, then oikawa-july-summer thus yellow). so yeah, anymore questions and stuff, leave em at the comments or you can hmu in twitter, @EITADAKIMASU. thank you for reading!!!


	4. snowflakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He clutched at Semi tighter, “Just stay awake for me okay? Tendou’s coming with an ambulance. We’re bringing you to the hospital.”
> 
> “I don’t think I can.” Acceptance, and maybe defeat.
> 
>  
> 
> *
> 
> semi eita from hajime's point of view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy 4/3 [iwasemi owo] day!!

Hajime woke up to the sunlight shining through the blinds and a warm breath on his back. He blinked his eyes open, trying to re-orient himself, and found that he isn’t in his own dorm room, not when the first thing he clearly saw is the rumpled sheets of Tendou’s empty and unmade bed (he knows it’s Tendou’s, the anime posters hanging on the wall gave it away). He felt something nuzzling at his back and turned to see Semi who was still asleep, mouth slightly agape and soft snores sounding from his mouth. He has seen Semi asleep so many times (whenever he stays in Hajime and Moniwa’s dorm during the weekends when Tendou’s boyfriend is over and when he dozes off during study sessions), but this is the only time he could truly appreciate Semi’s good looks.

It doesn’t help that the sunlight was making him look ethereal.

Semi is well on the good-looking side, and Hajime knows how to appreciate a pretty face when sees one. And getting to look at him this up close, Hajime notices things that he didn’t quite notice before, like the long lashes that fan out and casts shadows upon Semi’s cheeks. Or the pout on his thin lips that made him seem so adorable. He even noticed how soft Semi’s dyed hair looks. _The roots are growing out,_ he thought to himself. He also noticed Semi’s eyebrows drawn together and Hajime may or may have not poked it softly (it was cute can you blame him) which caused Semi to scrunch up his face and his eyes to slowly open, hand coming up to block out the sunlight.

“What time is it?” He asked groggily. Hajime turned to look at the small clock on Semi’s desk, squinting as he was met with the sunlight. “Quarter to 8.” He answered which caused Semi to groan and bury his face on his pillow, covering himself with the blanket.

“It’s too early, wake me up later at 10.” Semi said, his voice muffled by the pillow. Hajime chuckled softly, “You’re lucky you’re off work today, or we don’t even have morning practice.”

Semi moved his arms and covered Hajime with the blanket as well, which made the raven laugh. “Sleep now, talk later.”

“Alright, alright. Go back to dream land, sleepyhead.”

Another thing he noticed: Sleepy Semi is a cute and (slightly) grumpy Semi.

 

 

“Your roots are growing.” Hajime pointed out while waiting for Semi to get dressed so they could get lunch. Turns out that Hajime also fell asleep and when they both woke up, it is already 12 in the afternoon. They’re lucky it’s Tuesday and they don’t have classes. Semi hummed, “Should I dye it the same color?”

“Nah, dye it pink for a change.” Hajime said. Semi just shrugged, “Sure. Come with me to the salon after lunch?”

“Yeah, sure. Let’s go?” Semi nodded and they were off.

 

Semi legitimately dyed his hair pink and somehow got Hajime to dye his hair too, albeit a little differently (he only dyed the tips, just like Semi’s former hairstyle), which got them an outraged squawk from Tendou when they got back because “Semisemi, NOW YOU’RE HAIR LOOKS EVEN MORE RIDICULOUS!!” and “YOU GOT HAJIME-KUN TO DYE HIS HAIR AS WELL?!?! AND PINK?!?! YOU HAVE MATCHING HAIR COLORS AND I HONESTLY FEEL SO BETRAYED RIGHT NOW.”

Semi just grinned at him, “I’m promoting Hajime as my best friend,” which caused another outraged squawk from Tendou followed by incessant whining. Hajime just laughed at the display. Tendou stopped not too long after getting Semi to say that “yes, yes, you’re my best friend, you dork. Stop whining already,” which made Tendou jump and hug the now pink-haired man, making Semi sigh but there is a small smile playing on his lips.

 

 

Come weekend, there was no knock on the door of Hajime’s dorm room and a distressed Semi carrying his school stuff to stay with him for two nights while Tendou had his privacy in their dorm room with his boyfriend. Instead, there was a knock and Semi with his hands in his pockets, smiling slightly at Hajime, posture tensed but Hajime decided not to comment on it.

“Hey, I’m not sleeping over this weekend. My kouhai came over and would be staying with us until next week, I guess. I know we have stuff to do for that pair work we were assigned to, let’s just meet in the library or cafe?” Semi said, rubbing his nape with one hand.

“Yeah, sure. Just call or message me, alright?”

“Yeah, thanks Iwaizumi.” Semi said and flashed yet another small smile and turned back towards his own dorm room. Hajime just watched his back for a while before sighing and going back inside his room.

One thing Hajime noticed about Semi is that he is not one to talk about his emotions openly. Just like him. Maybe it was one of the things why he likes being with Semi, he isn’t one to push Hajime to spill everything. It was easy and it was calm being with him. It was nice not being on-guard with his emotions that one slip would make people bombard him with questions if he is alright. It was not like that with Semi. He can let his emotions show and Semi would just give that knowing look, that “I know you have a problem but I won’t force you to talk about it, just tell me at your own pace and I’ll wait” look, and it was nice not to feel pressured to talk about feelings.

He knows Semi knew he has Hanahaki, but he was glad Semi didn’t push the subject, instead let the opportunity to present itself for Hajime to tell him. He also knows that Semi knows he is keeping his own secrets, and maybe that’s how he knew that Semi is doing the same. Despite the joking, sassy and mothering exterior, he knows that there is a crack in Semi’s armor, he knows there is something wrong.

Wrong came in the form of a knock on his door at 1 in the morning and opening it to a familiar face with a head of copper-brown hair.

“Um, excuse me, Iwaizumi-san, is Semi-san here?” the boy asked and Hajime looked at him confusedly.

“Iwaizumi? Who’s there?” Moniwa asked sleepily from behind him and he turned to answer him, “It’s Semi’s kouhai from Shiratorizawa.” Moniwa nodded and went back to sleep and Hajime looked at the boy once again. “Semi is not here. Why?”

“Oh.” The boy bit his lip before continuing, “I thought he goes here after I fall asleep. I always feel the bed shifting and hear the door closing at this hour every night since I stayed last weekend so I thought this is where he goes to since you know, you’re close friends and you hang out.”

Hajime just looked at the boy in front of him. It’s the early hour of Wednesday morning and Semi is not in his room and Hajime thought back to the past days when Semi and he would meet and the latter would always look tired and worn out, like he was not having a good night’s sleep for days and maybe that was the case.

“Well, I’ll be off now, Iwaizumi-san. Sorry for disturbing your sleep.” The boy bowed and turned around to leave, which made Hajime snap out of his thoughts and stop him, “Uh, wait.” He said. “Um,”

“Shirabu.” The boy supplied when it was clear that Hajime doesn’t remember his name.

“Shirabu, I’ll go look for Semi. He may be in one of our few hang-out spots.” Hajime said and Shirabu nodded. “Thank you, Iwaizumi-san. Sorry for disturbing you late at night.” He said while bowing.

“Nah, it’s okay. Semi’s my friend as well. It’s not a big deal. Get your sleep, okay? I’ll make sure he comes back.” With his coat on, Hajime looked around and went to the places that he and Semi would hang-out, sometimes with Tendou, Moniwa, Sasaya and Kamasaki, sometimes just the two of them. Unfortunately, after almost an hour of searching, he wasn’t able to find him.

He was about to enter the dorm buildings and just call Semi when a few cherry blossoms fell from the sky, making him furrow his eyebrows in confusion because why are there cherry blossoms in December when it was supposed to be snowing?

He looked at the cherry blossoms he caught in his palm and looked up, and Hajime thought he saw a tuft of pink hair but it was gone immediately. That prompted him to go inside and make his way towards the rooftop of the dorm building. The door to the rooftop was glass and Hajime didn’t need to open the door to know that Semi is there because he can see him right through. He can see him leaning against the railings, watch the moonlight shone on his skin and the smoke that he thought would be from the cold when he didn’t notice the box of cigarettes in his back pocket. _Since when did Semi start to smoke?_

Semi wasn’t wearing a coat or a jacket and Hajime was tempted to go out there and drape his over Semi’s shoulder, if not for the nagging feeling inside him that says Semi wants and needs to be left alone. So, Hajime stood his ground and stayed by the stairs where he can see Semi. (His fingers would flinch everytime a shiver would rack Semi’s body and he had to stop himself from opening the door and just pull him inside where it is warm.)

With a sigh, Hajime removed his coat and left it by the door handle where Semi could see it easily so that he could wear it and warm up when he gets inside. Sparing one last look at the pink-haired man, he saw him reach into his back pocket and took another cigarette, and then he turned around and went back down, passing by Semi and Tendou’s to inform Shirabu that Semi would be back in a while and that the younger boy should sleep, before going to his and Moniwa’s room.

 

 

“Hey,” Semi greeted him at morning volleyball practice the next day. Iwaizumi looked up from tying his shoelaces and offered a small smile along with a greeting. Semi placed his things on the bench and gave Hajime his coat, “You know you didn’t have to leave your coat for me. What if it was another person who got it?”

Hajime took the coat and shrugged, “You were shivering out there, figured I’d leave it for you to wear and warm up once you got inside. And you got it, so there’s no problem now is there?”

Semi shook his head with a smile while starting to get changed into his practice clothes, “Why didn’t you join me if you were already there?”

“Figured you needed the time alone.”

“You know I wouldn’t mind if you joined me, right?”

“Yeah, but it would still feel wrong to invade. You needed it.”

Semi hummed in response and Hajime just sat there waiting for him to get changed. Once done, they both walked out and started to do their stretching before running 20 laps around the gym.

“Today’s the scheduled joint practice with Ushijima’s university, right?” Semi asked as they settled down and regained their breathing. Hajime hummed an affirmative before drinking from his bottle of water.

“Will you be fine?” Semi asked and Hajime didn’t miss the concern lacing his voice. Hajime just shrugged because even he himself isn’t so sure if he would be fine seeing Oikawa again. The coiling in his chest just gets tighter at the thought of it, flowers threatening to spill from within him which he forced to swallow down.

“I guess.”

 

 

The day rolled by and when afternoon came, both Hajime and Semi were running from class to the gym because they were late for the practice, and they had a match today. Their professor dismissed them late and the moment she stepped out of the room they bolted already.

They were in a hurry to bow apologetically to the coaches and get changed that they didn’t notice that the other team was already there, or that Shirabu was by the sidelines with Tendou and talking with Ushijima, Oikawa, Hanamaki and Matsukawa.

“Iwa-chaaaaaaaaaaan!!” He heard Oikawa shout and then a head of brown hair and an armful of Oikawa Tooru was draped over him. “Iwa-chan, are you feeling alright? Were you able to rest well these past few days?”

“Get off me, Shittykawa. You’re so fucking heavy.” He said and gently pushed Oikawa off him.

“Hmph, so rude, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa said, crossing his arms with a pout, making Iwaizumi sigh heavily. He felt an a hand squeeze on his shoulder and he turned to see Semi smiling sympathetically at him, but his eyes were searching his face, _Are you okay?,_ and Hajime gave a nod. Semi patted him and went towards his own former teammates.

“You and Semi-chan are awfully close.” Oikawa said, following Semi with his eyes, brown orbs glinting with amusement. Hajime huffed, “Well, he is my classmate and my setter, and on top of that, he is my friend, so yes we are close.”

Oikawa turned back to look at him, and he grinned. Hajime felt his heart leap from his chest because that familiar grin is one of the things he loves about Oikawa. He leaned closely towards Hajime and the raven felt his breath shorten. Oikawa is so, so close. He wanted to lift his hand up and pull him closer. He can see Oikawa’s lips (soft, pink lips) moving but he can’t hear anything except for the loud beating of his heart.

“W-what?” He stuttered, and he can feel the heat creeping up from his neck until his cheeks, which made Oikawa grin even wider. “Aha! I knew it, Iwa-chan!”

“Knew what?” He asked, confused. Oikawa leaned back, thankfully, and started squealing. “Hajime likes Semi-chan~”

“What the fuck.” He deadpanned.

“You were blushing and stuttering a while ago!” Oikawa said and moved to evade Hajime’s hand that came up to hit him. Oikawa just stuck his tongue out at him and kept on announcing that ‘Hajime likes Semi-chan,’ earning him amused looks from Hanamaki, Tendou, and Matsukawa, and a raised eyebrow from Semi.

Hajime just massaged his forehead because damn it, it has been so long since he came to stand closely and blushed because of Oikawa, not that he will let the brunet know. With a sigh, he moved towards where the small group of his friends are huddled together and sat down on the empty seat beside Semi, earning him a teasing look from Oikawa, which he pointedly ignored.

 

 

The match started in 15 minutes with the opposite team gaining the lead immediately, and Hajime’s team tailing a point or three behind. The first set ended in the opposite team’s favor and they took a rest before the second set started.

In those few minutes of break time, they heard Moniwa’s voice faintly from outside the gym and he sounds distressed.

“Futakuchi!” they heard him shout and Hajime noticed Shirabu’s form freeze up from where he was seated beside Tendou. The copper-haired boy seemed to make himself smaller and tried to hide between him, Semi and Tendou.

A tall brunet appeared inside the gym, eyes searching until his gaze landed on the side of their team and he made his way immediately. Moniwa appeared by the doorway not long after, chest heaving, with Sasaya behind him.

“Kenjirou.” The tall brunet said, making Shirabu flinch. The copper-haired boy straightened his back but refused to look at the tall brunet behind him. The atmosphere was tensed, and Hajime could see Moniwa in the corner of his eyes apologizing profusely to their coach for disturbing the practice match.

The tense atmosphere was broken by Semi’s heavy sigh, which made Shirabu and the tall brunet look at him. “It’s been, what? 4 days? 5 days?  Since you two last talked. I think it’s time that you two sort out whatever happened in your relationship, don’t you think?” He said, which made Shirabu’s shoulder drop. Semi just pat his head softly before gesturing to the tall brunet, “Go, Kenjirou. Fix this.” They heard Shirabu huff out a “fine” under his breath before standing and walking out of the gym, Futakuchi following behind. Semi just looked at them leave before sighing and turning to walk towards the bathroom.

“Guys, I’m sorry for disturbing your practice. I didn’t know Futakuchi was here, he just showed up to our dorm and was asking for Shirabu.” Moniwa said. Tendou offered him a bottle of water which he took gratefully and drank. “It’s okay. Don’t sweat it. Luckily, we’re on our break.” Hajime said and Moniwa nodded.

“Take a seat and catch your breath. You two don’t have classes?” Tendou asked them, making way for Sasaya and Moniwa to sit down.

“Nah, we’re done for the day. We’re just waiting for Yasushi to finish up. I’ll just text him to meet us here.” Sasaya said.

 

Semi returned just in time for the second set to start.

“Are you okay? You look kinda pale.” Hajime asked. Semi just smiled at him and told him he is fine. Hajime didn’t believe him, even more so when he saw the knowing look Tendou gave Semi which the latter just ignored.

 

The second set ended in favor of the opposite team once more. Semi seemed to have lost his composure after the first set, and he apologized for not being able to give his 100% concentration to the game. Coach said it was fine, as long as he makes up for his performance in the next time a practice match would be held. They changed their clothes immediately and when they got out, Shirabu is standing along with Tendou, Sasaya and Moniwa, hand intertwined with the tall brunet from earlier, Futakuchi, and the other hand holding his duffel bag.

“Well, I take it went well.” Semi said once they reached the small group and Shirabu bowed his head slightly to cover up a blush, which made Futakuchi laugh.

“I’ll be leaving for Sendai tonight.” Shirabu said and took out the dorm key and gave it back to Semi. “Thank you for letting me stay with you, Semi-san.”

“It’s nothing. Did you tell him what you finally plan to do in college?” Semi asked and Shirabu nodded with a grin. “Yeah. I’m not going to play anymore, but I’ll be going here. I passed my application a while ago.”

Hajime didn’t miss the fond way Futakuchi looked at Shirabu, nor the affectionate gesture when he kissed the boy on his temple, making Tendou say “aww how adorable.”

Semi smiled at them, “I’m glad.”

Shirabu nodded, “We’ll be taking our leave. Train leaves at 7:00. See you soon.” He said and bowed to them, giving Semi a short hug, which took the pink-haired man by surprise before he patted the boys back and he was released from the hug, “Thank you again,” and then both of them left.

Matsukawa and Hanamaki appeared behind Hajime, startling him when they clapped their hands loudly. “What a cute and heartfelt moment, isn’t it Issei?” Hanamaki said, wiping invisible tears.

Matsukawa nodded solemnly, “It is, Hiro. What a beautiful young love. I wish I had that.”

“You don’t need that when you have a wonderful everlasting love with me, bro.”

“Aw, I love you, bro.” Matsukawa said, offering his fist to which Hanamaki answered with his, “I love you too, bro.”

“You two are so gay. I love it.” Tendou said with a wide grin.

“We know you do.” Matsukawa said aiming finger guns at him. “So, Oikawa and Ushiwaka are going out for a dinner date somewhere. You all want to grab dinner and let’s have our own group date, perhaps?” Everyone agreed except Semi. “I’m done for the day.” He said. “You all have fun, alright? Satori, please no alcohol.”

Tendou faked a horrified gasp, “Semisemi, I would never. You trust me so little, I am hurt.” Semi just rolled his eyes and started to walk away from the group, “I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

 

 

Hajime didn’t see him again the following days, not in class nor in volleyball practice. He saw Tendou during morning practice once, talking to the coaches and he didn’t miss the shocked look the head coach gave Tendou which turned to a dark one, before he nodded. Tendou was gone before Hajime could ask what was up with Semi. He tried calling him, even knocking on the door to his dorm room, but Hajime would always be left unanswered.

 

The last day of the week was the final straw.

Hajime was set on going to Semi and Tendou’s dorm room and kick the door down if he has to just to know if Semi is well or not, when he saw Tendou leaning by the wall outside his classroom. His hair wasn’t in its usual gelled hairstyle, and when he looked up at Hajime, his eyes were red and puffy. He offered a small smile and a quiet “hey” when Hajime approached him.

“What happened to you?” He asked him, brow furrowed in concern. Tendou stood up straight and let out a sigh. Hajime could tell that he wasn’t able to get some sleep as well based on the bruises lining the undersides of his eyes. Tendou ran his hand through his hair and bit his lip. “Tendou..”

Tendou looked met his eyes and saw the unshed tears waiting to fall, his lips wobbly and voice shaky when he spoke, “It’s Eita.”

 

It was enough for Hajime to go back to the dorms and rush towards Tendou and Semi’s room. Tendou handed him his set of keys before allowing Hajime to leave, telling him that he wouldn’t be able to get in because Semi refused to go out or even open the door to anyone.

 _“Please, at this point, you’re the only one I can think of that could convince him. Even Moniwa and Kamasaki tried but failed. Please, Hajime.”_ Tendou pleaded and Hajime’s heart was racing because of the million possibilities that could’ve happened to Semi but one thought remained in his mind and he wished that it won’t be that.

“Semi!” He called out immediately once the door was unlocked. He was met by a room full of cherry blossoms. Semi’s sheets were rumpled, and he even thought he saw a bit of red in his now white-colored beddings. He heard a violent wave of coughs and turned towards the direction of the bathroom, where he saw Semi hunched over the toilet, pink cherry blossoms around him, the full-grown ones, and his skin was very pale. He was sweating and Hajime could see his eyes drooping.

Hajime rushed to him and dropped to his knees beside him, pulling Semi close and wiping the blood that stained his lips. He noticed the floor littered with droplets of blood as well and he blinked his eyes to prevent the tears from falling.

“Hey, Semi. Stay with me, okay?” He told him. Semi nodded, movement small but Hajime felt the bob of his head against his chest. Semi’s breathing was labored and Hajime’s hand was shaking while he took out his phone to call Tendou.

“Tendou, call an ambulance. Now, please.” Hajime said once Tendou answered the phone, and the redhead might have heard the desperation in his voice because he muttered an affirmative and ended the call immediately.

“Oi, Semi. Don’t sleep on me now.” He said. Semi opened his eyes slightly and Hajime could see the tiredness and pain in his coffee-brown orbs. He remembered that time during his final year that almost full-bloomed flowers flowed from his mouth. Hanamaki and Matsukawa had to rush him to the nearby hospital. The doctor advised him to take the surgery, but he said no. It was still the same until now, same almost full-bloomed yellow flowers and sometimes a hint of blood, but never this worst.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Hajime asked. Semi just laughed but it was weak, “I didn’t have to. I know that you knew.”

“A phone call or a message would have been nice still. Not disappearing for a whole week.” Hajime said, “How long?”

“Since the Inter-High during our third year.”

“Shirabu?” Hajime guessed and he felt Semi nod before they settled into silence.

 

“Hajime.” He heard Semi call and he hummed in reply, hands coming up to comb through his pink-dyed locks. “It hurts.” Hajime closed his eyes but it wasn’t able to stop a lone tear from falling. _I know, I know._

He clutched at Semi tighter, “Just stay awake for me okay? Tendou’s coming with an ambulance. We’re bringing you to the hospital.”

“I don’t think I can.”

Acceptance, and maybe defeat.

He heard the door open, and by the time Tendou and the hospital staff came in, it was too late.

 

The first snowflakes of December fell at the same time the light from Semi’s eyes dimmed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soo, this is nearing its end. about 1 or 2 more chapters, i guess.


	5. smokes and winters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There were flowers everywhere, and Eita doesn’t care to clean them up. The space would just get filled once again.
> 
> And he’s just so, so tired.
> 
> “He’s not worth it anymore, Eita.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're back with semi's perspective. two more chapters (i think) and we're done yay yay. i hope you enjoy the update. figured i'd slip this in before classes resumed tomorrow after the long weekend. 
> 
> enjooyyy!

Sometimes Eita thought of just how many deities he has wronged that made him stand in this unfortunate situation wherein he would be spouting flowers here and there all because of unrequited love. It tastes shitty, and it feels shitty. It’s unfair.

What’s more unfair is going out with Tendou and Kawanishi during the weekend and finding Shirabu with them. The boy looked the same as he did months ago, only slightly taller. Tendou and Kawanishi looked at him apologetically, and he just waved them off.

“Kenjirou’s staying with us for the weekend as well.” Tendou informed him once they were on the way to the movies, Kawanishi and Shirabu trailing behind them. Eita just shrugged.

“Will you be fine?”

“I guess.”

 

 

He wasn’t fine. Not with Shirabu near. The boy informed them with a deep, heavy sigh that he came down to Tokyo with Kawanishi because apparently, he and his boyfriend got into a big fight after the defeat of Shiratorizawa against Seijoh. Shirabu doesn’t want to talk about it, nor talk to his boyfriend that’s why he decided that running away from the problem is the best course of action.

It didn’t help that Shirabu shared his bed with him, nor did the fact that the copper-haired boy decided that he won’t be going back to Sendai for the week. And it seems that he was prepared with the amount of clothes he stuffed inside his duffel bag.

“How were you so sure that I would even let you in our dorm room?” Eita asked as he unlocked the door, opening it and letting Shirabu in, Kawanishi and Tendou following behind them.

“You aren’t that cruel to let your kouhai wander the streets alone with nowhere to sleep in the cold December night, are you Semi-san?” Shirabu said, a challenging glint to his eyes.

 _And he still is a snarky and adorable little brat._ Eita mused.

“Whatever, if you huddle all the blankets to yourself, I’m kicking you out.” He said and turned around to take a bath.

 

 

Needless to say, his coughing of flowers became harder to control when Shirabu is around that at midnight, when everyone is asleep, he would slowly get out of bed to get out of the room. He went to the rooftop, figured he needed the air in order to breathe again with the lack of oxygen in his lungs, and in the first night he spent there, he was met with Kamasaki.

Kamasaki nodded at him as a greeting and he nodded back, standing beside him in the cold, December night. It’s winter and it would probably be snowing soon.

“Can’t sleep?” Kamasaki asked as he took a hit from his cigarette.

“Nah, how about you?”

“Can’t.” Kamasaki answered. Eita looked at him and saw the troubled look on his face. “Want to talk about it?” He asked, and was surprised that Kamasaki nodded. They weren’t exactly close friends as they don’t hang out often due to their conflicting schedules except for those times that they got to, but even so, it was with their small friend group.

“Moniwa and Sasaya talked to me today,” he started and Eita hummed to let him know he was listening. “I knew it was coming, but I kept evading it. Obviously, you know, they got tired and decided to corner me instead.

“They told me they wanted to try this… thing between us. I didn’t know what to say, so I pretended to be my usual stupid self and asked them, ‘what thing?’” Kamasaki took a deep breath before continuing, “They told me they like me, in a romantic way and I.. I don’t know, Semi. I’m afraid, I guess? It didn’t work out for me last time.”

Eita hummed in thought, “Well, maybe, it is time for you to let go of your fears and thread lightly into this budding romance between the three of you. Do you want to be with them?”

“I do.” Kamasaki answered quietly.

“Then, I guess there’s nothing much to be afraid of, not if they also want this with you as much as you want this with them.”

“Would you say yes if it was you?”

Eita gave a light shrug, “I guess. If the person wants to be with me, then I guess I would want to try to be with that person too. As long as we both want to be and are invested in that new relationship, then maybe there won’t be much of a problem.”

Kamasaki hummed in reply, puffing out smoke from his cigarette and offering Eita one, which the latter took gratefully. It wasn’t his first time smoking. Tendou and him “experimented” sometime in high school during one of those training camps and luckily, they weren’t caught or who knows what punishment they would’ve gotten.

“How about you? What kept you up tonight?” Kamasaki asked him.

“A bratty kouhai of mine went down from Sendai and is staying with us.”

Kamasaki snorted, “Let me guess, he kicks and snores in his sleep?”

“More than that.” Eita answered. Kamasaki studied him carefully before answering, “Yeah, I get you.”

 

They stayed for a little bit more until Kamasaki decided to snuff out his cigarette and went on ahead.

“Don’t worry about it and talk to them tomorrow.” Eita advised him and Kamasaki nodded with thanks before he left. Eita continued to smoke the cigarette. And it became a nightly habit for him to go out there in the rooftop at midnight and smoke, hoping that it would burn out the flowers that clog his lungs.

 

It didn’t.

 

 

“So, are you going to stop being a brat and go talk to him already?” Eita asked as he sat down in the café with Shirabu while they both wait for Tendou before grabbing dinner and returning to the dorms.

“Nope.” Shirabu answered simply before sipping at his caramel frappe.

Eita sighed, “What is even the issue between the two of you?”

Shirabu just looked at him and Eita held the gaze, unwavering, until Shirabu sighed in defeat. “After the team lost from Seijoh in the Spring High, I was devastated, I guess and it didn’t fair well when we talked about college. He got an offer here, and I got an offer somewhere else. I was undecided and I didn’t want to talk about it yet but he insisted and it went from there. It was petty, I know but” Shirabu just shrugged.

“But you’re a prideful little shit that you decided to just run away instead of talking it out with him?” Eita supplied which earned him a glare from Shirabu. _So (not) cute._

Eita sighed, “Do you still want to play volleyball?”

“I.. don’t really know.” Shirabu said.

“Well, figure out if you still want to play volleyball and you two could go from there.”

“How did you know you still wanted to play, Semi-san?”

“I was already decided to stop for college, like Tendou did. But the scholarship offer came and I had to take it, figured out this was my second chance in the sport, you know?” Shirabu nodded and proceeded to ask questions regarding the school and the volleyball team and Eita just let him.

 

 

Eita could feel his energy dwindling and he is thankful that his body hasn’t decided to fail him yet. The sleepless nights continued for 4 more nights, with Shirabu still not going back to Sendai and Eita coughing out more flowers than he did before. His throat hurts and he could feel his lungs being squeezed which made him decide to buy cough medicines to ease the coughing even if just a little.

“You look like shit.” Iwaizumi greeted when they met each other for their pair project.

“Well, hello to you, too.” He said sarcastically while placing his stuff down. Iwaizumi just looked at him which prompted Eita to raise an eyebrow at him, “What?”

“Nothing. Where did we end yesterday?” He asked and Eita was thankful that if Iwaizumi noticed something, he decided not to pry.

 

 

“Taichi is asking for you.” Tendou said as he and Eita walked out of the dorm buildings together.

“Tell him I’m fine.” Eita answered.

“I would, but he wouldn’t buy that. I wouldn’t either. You haven’t been sleeping well at all and well, you’re very pale, Eita. Don’t think that I didn’t know you’re sneaking out every night. Even Kenjirou isn’t that stupid not to know.”

Eita just sighed, and massaged his forehead. He can already feel the incoming headache. “Just drop it, Satori.”

“Fine, but you know my stand about the matter stays. As well as Taichi’s. Get the surgery. It isn’t worth it anymore,” was Tendou’s last statement before they part ways and Eita headed towards the gym for morning volleyball practice.

Iwaizumi was already there, dressed in his volleyball clothes and tying his shoes when Eita entered the locker rooms. He returned the coat that he found hanging by the door to the rooftop. Eita knew it was Iwaizumi’s as he had seen the raven wear it on some occasions, and well it smells like Iwaizumi.  

“You know I wouldn’t mind if you joined me, right?” He asked when Iwaizumi told him why he didn’t join him last night in the rooftop when he was already there.

“Yeah, but it would still feel wrong to invade. You needed it.”

Eita just offered a hum in response, but he was glad that despite Iwaizumi knowing that something was bothering Eita, he was polite enough to know when to and when not to pry and just leave Eita alone to sort out his thoughts. And he was thankful for that, thankful for a wonderful friend that he found in Iwaizumi.

 

 

Practice in the afternoon came and they would be playing once again with Ushijima’s university as a make-up for the last one that got postponed because of what happened to Iwaizumi in the middle of the game. He was worried about Iwaizumi seeing Oikawa that when they entered the gym and greeted their coaches, he didn’t notice Shirabu sitting and engaging in a conversation with Tendou, Oikawa, Ushijima, Matsukawa and Hanamaki, not until he and Iwaizumi got changed and were walking towards the small group.

He stopped in his tracks and took a deep breath before starting to walk towards them, passing by Iwaizumi who has Oikawa all over him and placing a hand on his shoulder, silently asking if he’s alright. Iwaizumi nodded and Eita continued to walk towards their small group of friends, sitting on the space beside Tendou who was engaged in a conversation with Shirabu and Ushijima about the current condition of their former team.

“Goshiki is still as loud as ever,” Shirabu said, scrunching up his nose in distaste as if he can hear the sound of Goshiki’s loud voice. “But he is doing better, doesn’t whine as much as before. Sagae is there to keep his ass in check now that the third years have retired.”

Tendou sniffed and wiped an invisible tear from his eye, “Tsutomu has grown so well, I’m so proud.”

Eita just huffed at Tendou’s dramatic display. “How about we go to Sendai after the semester to visit?” He suggested, which earned him excited looks from Tendou, Matsukawa and Hanamaki. Ushijima seemed to ponder the thought before a look that resembled excitement crossed his features. Shirabu remained impassive, but it seems like he is already thinking of the impending headache (due to Goshiki being overly excited and showing off to their senpais and Kawanishi and Tendou being all over each other) that Eita’s suggestion would cause.

“Let’s do that! Then let’s have a Seijoh vs Shiratorizawa match just like the old times.” Hanamaki said, grinning and Matsukawa nodded in agreement.

“Sure, sure. Let’s do that.” Eita replied, mirroring a grin of his own.

“Prepare to get your asses handed back to you boys, because we ain’t losing this time.” Hanamaki said with a challenging but playful glint in his eyes.

“Not if it happens to you first.” Tendou retaliated.

“Oho, you’re on bitches.”

“Hajime likes Semi-chaaan~!” Oikawa nearly-shouted and they all turned to look at him and a blushing Iwaizumi. Tendou, Hanamaki and Matsukawa looked at the display with amusement while Eita just raised an eyebrow. His eyes met Iwaizumi’s and the raven just let out a deep sigh before walking towards the benches and sitting on the empty space beside Eita.

“Stretch?” Eita asked and Iwaizumi nodded. They both stood up and moved away a little from the group to do their stretching before the coach called for them and the practice match started.

 

 

Eita brushes off the feeling of someone watching him. It makes his throat feel constricted, his lungs closing off. He tried to regain his breathing back to normal, and pretend that he doesn’t feel a pair of brown-eyes studying him.

The set ended in favor of Ushijima’s team and they all took a break. He caught Shirabu’s gaze as he walked back towards the benches, his mouth moving as he turned to face Tendou.

“—seems to be doing better and even matching Iwaizumi-san’s play style.” He heard the Shirabu say.

“Well, Eita-kun is a setter you can’t take your eyes off because he would let you know that he’s there. Once you brush him off, you’re doomed. He’s ruthless, and so is Hajime-kun. And well, they do have extended serving and spiking practice all by themselves, thus the wonderful setter-spiker connection.” Tendou said, a hint of pride directed towards Eita and Iwaizumi heard in his voice, and Shirabu nodded. The red-head offered water bottles and towels to both Eita and Iwaizumi and the two muttered their thanks before drinking and wiping off their sweat.

While they were catching their breathes and talking about what kind of plays they would perform in the next set, they heard Moniwa’s voice. “Futakuchi!”

Eita noticed Shirabu stiffen when he heard the name, and he had an idea of who it might be.

All heads turned towards the gym entrance and a tall brunet showed up, eyes darting everywhere until it landed on their side and he walked over immediately until he was standing in front of Eita and behind Shirabu.

“Kenjirou.” The tall brunet called and Eita saw Shirabu flinch but he didn’t make a move except for straightening his body. He can see Shirabu’s features morphing into contemplation, and he can feel the tensed atmosphere as all eyes were suddenly on them, curious and waiting. Eita released a heavy sigh which made the tall brunet and Shirabu look at him, but his eyes were only on the younger setter.

“It’s been, what? 4 days? 5 days? Since you two last talked. I think it’s time that you two sort out whatever happened in your relationship, don’t you think?” Shirabu’s shoulders dropped in defeat and Eita can even make out the pout that formed on his lips. He pat his head softly, gesturing towards the tall brunet standing beside him, “Go Kenjirou. Fix this.” With a huff, Shirabu stood up and walked out of the gym, the tall brunet following behind him, but not before giving a nod of thanks to Eita, to which he just smiled in return. 

He looked at them leave, and he can feel Tendou’s calculating gaze on him. He sighed and turned around to walk towards the bathroom, the tightening of his chest and constricting of his throat becoming too much that the moment he was alone, he wasn’t able to stop the cherry blossoms from spilling.

He’s been constantly tired these days, even more so than usual. The flowers spilled in much more frequency as compared to before ever since Shirabu showed up in his university, a little more mature, but as beautiful as ever. He should be forgetting about him, moving on little by little, but it wasn’t the case. His heart just swelled in his chest when he first laid his eyes on him for the first time in months, and it seems that the flowers did too. They weren’t just the small ones anymore. They were starting to bloom, and Eita feels more deprived of oxygen.

 

He got back in time for the second set to start, and Iwaizumi asked him if he was fine considering he was very pale, to which he just answered that he is. Eita can feel Tendou’s eyes on him but he pointedly ignored it.

His focus seems to be somewhere else when the match started once again. And he keeps on struggling to regulate his breathing. His limbs feel weak, and he may have sent sloppy tosses a few times. He was distracted, that much was obvious, and he was just grateful that his teammates and coach are kind enough to not chew him out because of his unusually poor performance in the game today.

Iwaizumi patted his back, and Eita was thankful for the comforting gesture.

 

They got changed and when they got out, Shirabu was already there with his duffel bag, hands intertwined with the tall brunet from earlier. Eita willed himself to look away, but he can’t.

“Well, I take it went well.” He said once he and Iwaizumi reached their small group. Shirabu bowed his head slightly to cover up the blush that made its way into his face, and Eita thought it was adorable, watching the boy blush because he is flustered rather than because he was angry.

“I’ll be leaving for Sendai tonight.” Shirabu said and gave him back his dorm key. Eita gave him his so that he can go in and out whenever he pleases when Eita and Tendou are in their classes. Eita took it from him, their fingers brushing briefly, a feather-light touch, almost as if it was never there, but it affected Eita all the same. Heart beating fast, lungs closing in.

“Thank you for letting me stay with you, Semi-san.”

“It’s nothing. Did you tell him what you finally plan to do in college?” Eita asked because he remembered it from one of their conversations where Shirabu asked him for advice on what he should do for college. The boy was conflicted, and Eita just told him to follow his heart, as cheesy and sappy as it may sound, because there are more important things in life than those that you came to know. Shirabu nodded with a grin. “Yeah. I’m not going to play anymore, but I’ll be going here. I passed my application a while ago.”

Eita noticed the fond way the tall brunet looked at Shirabu, filled with love and adoration, that it made Eita’s own chest hurt, because at some point, he wanted to be the one to stand beside Shirabu and look at him like that, like Shirabu is his world.

Eita swallowed hard, willing the flowers not to spill before he smiled at them, “I’m glad.”

“We’ll be taking our leave. Train leaves at 7:00. See you soon.” Shirabu informed them and bowed, giving Eita a short hug, which took him by surprise. He just patted the his back lightly, afraid that if he fully returned the hug, he might have a hard time letting him go. “Thank you again,” Shirabu said and he left with his boyfriend.

Eita just remained looking at their retreating backs, the playful conversation of his friends a silent noise behind him.

 “—want to grab dinner and let’s have our own group date, perhaps?” He heard Matsukawa ask them just in time that Eita turned around to look at them. “I’m done for the day.” He said. “You all have fun, alright? Satori, please no alcohol.”

Tendou faked a horrified and offended gasp at him, “Semisemi, I would never. You trust me so little, I am hurt.” Eita just rolled his eyes and started to walk away from the group, raising his hand in a small wave, “I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

 

 

Tendou went home that night in a room full of cherry blossoms and Eita who collapsed in heavy limbs by the bathroom. Tendou immediately rushed towards him, and Eita can only make out his hushed voice before his eyelids became too heavy that he decided he should sleep.

  
He woke up to the sound of moving.

 

Tendou was cleaning their room, getting rid of the cherry blossoms that were scattered everywhere.

 

“They’re almost full-bloom,” Tendou muttered when he picked up one and blankly stared at it. “Eita.”

“You’re late, Satori. Go to class. I’ll clean up right here.” He said and covered himself in blankets once more, waiting for Tendou to get dressed and leave before letting out a string of coughs, coupled with the almost-full-bloom cherry blossoms.

 

 

It was getting harder to breathe, and getting harder to muster up the strength to get up in the mornings and attend his classes. He feels weak, every small movement enough to make him feel like he ran miles on how much taxing it is to his breathing. Kawanishi went down to visit, and tried to talk to him, but Eita skirted around the topic until his kouhai just gave up. Moniwa and Kamasaki went to visit as well, because they know, and because Tendou thought the two of them could convince Eita to get his ass in gear and just take the damn surgery. He thought wrong.

“Eita would you just take the fucking surgery, please.” Tendou said, his voice cracking at the end and Eita turned to see him crying. “Please, Eita. I can’t.. I can’t stand to see you like this, not when there’s a way you can get yourself out of it.”

Eita just looked at him and wiped the tears that fell from Tendou’s eyes but he remained silent. He doesn’t know what to say nor what to feel anymore. There were flowers everywhere, and Eita doesn’t care to clean them up. The space would just get filled once again.

And he’s just so, so tired.

“He’s not worth it anymore, Eita.”

 

 

There were days when Eita would completely question himself for not doing something that he should have done before. Today was one of those days, when it dawned upon him that the flowers that came out of his mouth were already full-bloomed, and there was blood accompanying it. He felt light-headed, and he stumbled towards the bathroom, where he spent a long time just hunched over the toilet, letting the flowers continually spill until it overflowed and covered the bathroom floor. It was pink, edges tinted with the crimson of his blood. His throat feels like it’s been rubbed raw, and his lungs felt like it was on fire.

His consciousness was wavering and he barely heard the door open, and before he knew it, Iwaizumi was there crouching beside him, holding him close.

“Hey, Semi. Stay with me, okay?” He heard Iwaizumi tell him to which he nodded because he can’t muster up the energy to talk. His mouth feels dry, his breathing labored. He heard Iwaizumi call Tendou, his voice sounds far away as Eita struggled to maintain his consciousness when his body is screaming at him to let go and fall into the darkness.

“Oi, Semi. Don’t sleep on me now.” Iwaizumi said, and despite feeling tired, Eita opened his eyes slightly, meeting the worried and panicked look that swims in Iwaizumi’s olive-green eyes. “Why didn’t you say anything?” Iwaizumi asked and Eita just let out a weak laugh, “I didn’t have to. I know that you knew.”

“A phone call or a message would have been nice, still. Not disappearing for a whole week. How long?”

“Since the Inter-High during our third year.”

“Shirabu?” Iwaizumi guessed and Eita nodded before silence enveloped them.

“Hajime.” He called out to him and Iwaizumi hummed in reply, hands coming up to comb through his pink-dyed locks in a comforting gesture. “It hurts,” because it does. His lungs burned, his chest ached, his throat and mouth dry.

He felt Iwaizumi clutch him tighter, “Just stay awake for me okay? Tendou’s coming with an ambulance. We’re bringing you to the hospital.”

“I don’t think I can.”

And Eita finally let his eyes drop and his consciousness fade away, the tendrils of copper-brown hair matching copper-brown eyes that belongs to a pretty, youthful face the last thing he remembers before everything went black.

_“Kenjirou.”_


	6. needles, scalpels and roots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey, Hajime.” He called and turned to look at him, chocolate-brown meeting olive-green, “Take the surgery with me.”
> 
> ***
> 
> Eita and Hajime take the surgery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm feeling amazing today despite being tired so i decided to update the fic. this is the second to the last chapter, and hopefully i could upload the last one by next week once i'm satisfied with it and ironed everything out. 
> 
> this has a little bit of changing perspectives, alternating from eita and hajime. i hope u enjoy the update and pls tell me what u think about it in the comments.
> 
> //btw, i'm dedicating this chapter to my bestfriend (Hi chelsy ily). It was the 5th chapter that was supposed to be dedicated to her but i forgot, so i'm dedicating this one instead.//

When Eita came through, he was met by blinding lights and white walls. He felt something painful in his hand and turned to see a dextrose placed there. On his other hand was a noticeable weight, and he turned to see a head of red hair and a hand holding his. On the couch by the side of the room was Iwaizumi, head bowed down as he dozed off.

He moved his hand, and he felt Tendou stir, until the redhead straightened and opened his eyes, smiling when he noticed Eita awake, “Hey, Semisemi.”

“Hey. How long was I out?” He asked, sitting up. Tendou stood and helped him, then turned to hand him a glass filled with water before sitting back down on the chair beside Eita’s hospital bed.

“10 hours, I think. Hajime-kun found you in our bathroom, tried to get you to stay awake. When we arrived, you were already unconscious, and you were barely breathing.”

Once Tendou mentioned it, he noticed the pain in his chest at each intake of breath.

“You scared me you know? You scared us. I thought you were—” Tendou started to cry before he can even finish his sentence, and Eita understood.

Tendou thought he died. And at one point, Eita himself thought that, too.

Tendou leaned his forehead on Eita’s shoulder and he just let him. Iwaizumi stirred, and blinked his eyes open. He stood up and stretched before walking towards the hospital bed. “Hey.” Iwaizumi greeted him. Eita smiled, “Hey.”

“I thought you were gone. You can’t leave me hanging like that you know.” Iwaizumi frowned, “You’re like my partner, don’t go scaring me off like that. Don’t go scaring everyone off like that, you ass.”

Eita thought he may have heard a slight crack in Iwaizumi’s voice, but he didn’t mention it.

“I’m sorry.” And he was.

“You better be, Eita-kun. You’re treating everyone to a very nice meal once you get out of here.” Tendou muttered, which made Iwaizumi and Eita huff out a laugh. The air around the three of them felt lighter than it did when Eita woke up, and he can’t help but hope that maybe, things would start to go wonderfully from then on.

 

Moniwa, Kamasaki and Sasaya came later with dinner. Moniwa apologized for being late and Kamasaki hit him lightly on the head on the chances that maybe “ _your brain would be shaken up so you could stop being so goddamn stubborn, man._ ” Eita laughed despite the gesture, and offered them his apologies as well. For being stubborn enough and not listening when they were trying to help him out. He was too much in his head and Tendou didn’t pass up the opportunity to agree whole-heartedly.

“You’re never going to let me live this down, are you?” Eita asked while they were eating dinner.

“Nope.” Tendou simply said as he slurped his noodles and they all laughed.

 

Visiting hours came to an end and the hospital only allows one companion to stay with the patient. Iwaizumi offered to stay as he already called their department head earlier and informed them of the situation, therefore excusing himself and Eita from their classes until Eita was well enough to return. There were no disagreements, and soon enough everyone was ready to leave, promising to return the next day along with clothes and necessary stuff for both Eita and Iwaizumi.

Once they were alone, Iwaizumi sat down on the chair beside Eita’s bed.

“What?” Eita asked and Iwaizumi just raised an eyebrow at him. “You wanted to tell me something. You’ve been quiet ever since I woke up.”

Iwaizumi sighed because, yes Eita was right.

“How are you feeling?” Iwaizumi asked casually, and Eita decided not to rush him, so he answered as casually as Iwaizumi is. “In pain. My chest hurts every time I inhale. How about you?” Iwaizumi just shrugged in response and they lapsed into silence, the humming of the television the only noise in the room.

“Was he worth it?” Eita asked, eyes trained on the television. “Oikawa. Was he worth it?” He knows he asked this before, but he felt the need to ask it again right now.

“He was.” Iwaizumi said. “Oikawa’s my best friend, and he would always be. He’s worth fighting for, but maybe not in the romantic sort of way. Not anymore.

“He’s got Ushiwaka, and he’s very happy and contented. I don’t see why I need to meddle, it would only cause pain for the three of us.”

Eita thought of Shirabu and Futakuchi. The way they held each other’s hands, fingers intertwined perfectly, the way the taller would gaze lovingly at Shirabu, the way Shirabu gave up volleyball because he found that there are more important things in this world, more beautiful things, and he found that in Futakuchi.

Eita wanted that too, wanted to know the things that are more important and way more wonderful than unrequited love and spilled cherry blossoms, than heartaches and burning lungs. And he knows just what to do.

“Hey, Hajime.” He called and turned to look at him, chocolate-brown meeting olive-green, “Take the surgery with me.”

It was an offer of walking away together from something that bounds them to their own pain and misery. It was an offer of a new beginning, and Eita was willing to take the step towards a future where he would never have to resent the beautiful flowers that mock him, where he can finally, finally breathe again, freely and without restraints.

Iwaizumi was just looking at him and Eita held his gaze, before his features softened and he smiled, “Yeah. Let’s do that.”

 

The next day, Iwaizumi was admitted to the hospital as well, and they were scheduled to take the surgery in a day. Hanamaki and Matsukawa went to visit, and they somehow got the doctor to agree that both of them would stay the night to accompany him before the surgery took place.

“Hey, you ready?” Eita asked through the phone as he called Iwaizumi.

“Nervous, but yeah. It’s now or never.”

“Now or never.” Eita echoed. “Are you having regrets?”

“Nah. Last night, I realized I’m fighting a battle I’ve already lost. And when you offered for me to take it the same time as you, I thought why not?

“Hanamaki and Matsukawa hit me hard on the head though. I swear to God the moment we get out of here, I’m going to lock their heads in a chokehold.”

He heard Matsukawa and Hanamaki’s protest from the other line and he laughed, “Just make sure not to get them killed. I kinda like them and Satori and I need our daily supply of memes."

Iwaizumi groaned, and Hanamaki and Matsukawa cheered, shouting something along the lines of, “Semi you’re the best bro! I love you dude!” and “Iwaizumi sucks, we’re replacing him with you.”

“I can’t believe you betrayed me like that, Semi.” Iwaizumi said in fake seriousness. Eita grinned, “You think so low of me, Hajime. I would never do that to you.”

“You just did, asshole.” Iwaizumi grumbled, making Eita laugh. Tendou reappeared from the bathroom, drying his hair with a towel and coming to sit beside Eita, smiling when he sees that his best friend looks more alive as compared to the past days.

“Well, time to sleep now. We’re having our surgery tomorrow.” Eita said. He heard Iwaizumi yawn before bidding his goodnight and ending the call.

“Are you ready for tomorrow, Eita-kun?” Tendou asked him as he settled on the bed. Eita looked at him and smiled, “Yeah. I am.”

 

***

 

“We’ll be here when you wake up.” Hanamaki said as Hajime was being injected with the anesthesia before he would be wheeled into the surgery room.

Hajime scoffed, “I’ll be seeing your faces first when I open my eyes. What a bummer.” Hanamaki gasped at him offendedly and Matsukawa patted his boyfriend’s back in sympathy. Hajime just smiled a little, grateful for his two best friends, before the anesthesia started to kick in and he felt drowsy.

It was time to let go, of everything that tied him to his romantic love towards Oikawa. No more heart aches and no more pathetic flowers. When he wakes up, the space that his love for Oikawa occupied in his heart would be gone, as if it was never there. It was scary, because loving Oikawa was something he knew for a long time, but it was refreshing as well. A new beginning. Hajime can say that he is also excited about it.

 

His last thought was Oikawa Tooru. His smile, his beautiful brown eyes, his laugh, his perfect hair, his fair skin, his wonderful talent, and that moment in high school when he realized he loved the man he spent his childhood and teenage days with. It was painful, yet it was also something he knew he would treasure forever.

He felt a lone tear escape from his eye before the darkness took him in.

 

_I love you, Tooru. Goodbye._

***

 

“Mom, stop crying. I’m only going to surgery. I’m not going to die.” Eita said as he consoled his crying mother who was tightly holding his hand.

“You almost did, you little shit.” His mother said and Eita felt guilty about keeping this from her and worrying her. Satori called his parents last night to let them know of the situation and come morning, they took the earliest train from Sendai to go down to Tokyo and be by their son’s side as he took the surgery. Granted they won’t be with him inside the surgery room, they would still be waiting in Eita’s room and be there when he wakes up.

The nurse entered the room, and Eita’s mother walked away from the side of the bed to give her space. She injected the anesthesia and Eita could feel the effects of the medicine within minutes.

“We’ll be waiting for you here.” Eita’s father told him with a smile as he consoled his wife, and Eita offered a small, sincere smile in return before sleep pulled him in.

 

 

The surgery took longer than the said estimated time of 5 hours. The surgeons had to take extra care in taking out the roots. They’ve been there for long and planted themselves almost too deep. Tendou was very nervous. He was glad Kawanishi was able to go down to Tokyo, albeit a little late, but still. He was there, and it helped Tendou calm down a bit. Hanamaki and Matsukawa were unusually silent. Iwaizumi’s parents came 2 hours after Iwaizumi went inside, and they took the group out for lunch while they wait for results. Tendou doesn’t want to go, neither do Hanamaki and Matsukawa, but with the insistence of Iwaizumi’s and Eita’s parents, they relented.

When they got back from lunch, Iwaizumi and Eita were done. Everyone sighed in relief when they heard that the surgeons were able to successfully remove all the roots that took residence in their lungs. Both were wheeled back into their respective hospital rooms already and were still sleeping, waiting for the anesthesia to wear off.

 

Tendou was out getting food with Kawanishi when Eita woke up. His mother was immediately on his side, pressing the button for assistance before helping Eita sit up, propping a pillow behind him. Eita hisses at the pain as it flooded through his upper torso, and muttered his thanks to his mother as she handed him a glass of water which he drank slowly.

The nurse came in not too long, followed by a doctor.

“How are you feeling?” The doctor asked as she finished checking Eita’s vital signs.

“My chest aches whenever I move.” Eita answered. The doctor nodded, writing something on her clipboard before looking up at him and his parents, “Well, that would be expected for the next couple days as your stitches heal. Just don’t move too much to not risk the opening of the wounds. I’ll be leaving painkillers in order to ease it.”

Tendou walked in, Kawanishi in tow, as the doctor and nurse exited the room. He placed the food by the table and moved to stand beside Eita’s hospital bed.

“How are you, Eita-kun?” He asked softly.

“I am physically aching but other than that, well.. It feels good, I guess.”

“Like you can breathe again?”

Eita smiled, “Yeah, like I could breathe again.”

“The doctor said your heartrate slowed down during the operation.” Her mother said from his other side, tears welling up in her eyes. “You almost neared death again you idiot. It’s the second time around it happened!”

While Eita’s mother isn’t really angry per se, everyone could understand her sudden outburst. Eita almost died twice. Everyone had been afraid when they heard the news.

Eita felt it. Like his life was slowly slipping away while under the haze of the anesthesia.

“I felt it, and I almost let it happen, you know.” Eita said quietly. Tendou turned to look at him with wide eyes, his mother’s cries became louder and she curled up on her husband’s chest. His father looked at him, betrayal and hurt crossing his features, “I only said I almost let it happen. I didn’t. I’m here right now aren’t I? You should know by now how stubborn I am that even death can’t get his firm hold on me.”

Kawanishi snorted at that and his mother removed herself from her curled up position beside her husband to hit Eita on the back of his head.

“Don’t do that again, or I swear I’ll be the one to put you in a casket.”

The tension and sadness of the atmosphere was once again replaced with happiness as they all laughed together and engage in light conversations over dinner.

Eita was glad he fought hard to retain his lifeline.

 

***

 

Of all the things he expected when he woke up, Oikawa Tooru wailing was not one of them.

“Why.” Hajime asked, more like stated, in his most deadpan voice.

“We passed by him when we returned from getting food with Kawanishi and Tendou.” Hanamaki rushed to explain. “He asked where we were headed and we tried to not let him come with us but you should know that never works with him because he is persistent as fuck.”

“And bored.” Matsukawa added. “Where is Ushiwaka, by the way?”

“He is having his regular check-up.” Oikawa answered and then turned to look at Hajime. “Why didn’t you tell me about this? I am incredibly hurt that Makki and Mattsun knew about this and I was kept in the dark.”

Hajime sighed, “It was a last-minute decision, okay? Eita asked me to take the surgery with him, and I did. I got admitted last night and had it this morning.”

Oikawa pouted and hummed in thought, “Who was it then? The cause for your Hanahaki?”

Hajime just looked at him, and he felt relieved when there was no more achy feeling in his chest, no more burning feeling in his lungs. He felt free, and lighter than he’d been in the past years. He used to look at Oikawa and he could feel the overwhelming love pouring from within him. And now he could look at Oikawa and see someone he grew up with, his best friend and nothing more.

A knock was heard and Hanamaki opened the door to see Ushijima standing there, “May I come in?” He asked and Hajime nodded his consent.

“So, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa was looking at him expectantly, his hand in Ushijima’s as the broader man stood beside him. Hajime couldn’t feel the pain where it was before, and he was glad that he could finally look at Oikawa in the eyes without fearing that he might shatter from all the pain he feels.

He smiles at him, without the strain that he came to know all these time, “It doesn’t matter now, does it?”

Oikawa just looked at him, and hummed thoughtfully, breaking eye contact. “I guess you’re right. But still, you could’ve told me, Iwa-chan. I could’ve been there to help you.” He sighed and stood up from the seat he was perched on and looked down at Hajime with a devious grin, “So, Eita huh?”

Hajime groaned. He should’ve known just how pushy Oikawa was that even the slightest slip of Hajime calling Semi by his first name wouldn’t be left unnoticed by the brunet.

“Why.” He asked to no one in particular, and he was glad that the doctors came in along with his parents. His mom and dad greeted Oikawa and Ushijima, fawning over the brunet and Ushijima excusing himself to visit Semi, as the doctor did his check-up on Hajime and his vital signs. Once done and been given his painkillers and a note of another visit for a check-up, the doctor left and his mother was on him instantly.

“Hey, mom.” He greeted her with a kiss on her cheek. “Where have you been?”

“We were just having a chat with Hanako-san and Kazuo-san. Apparently, Eita-chan woke up before you did, and we decided to check on him as well.”

“You visited other people before you visited your own son.” Hajime said, looking at his mother with mock disdain and betrayal. She scoffed, “Well, you told other people about your condition before you told your own parents about it.”

Hajime looked away in guilt, “I’m sorry.”

“You know we’re not going to hold it against you right?” His father said, coming to stand by his mother’s side. “Takahiro and Issei here caught us up with everything. Even Eita supplied us with a bit of information. But it doesn’t mean you’re off the loop young man. We need stories.”

Once again, Hajime released a groan and covered his face with his hands. He heard everyone laugh at his misery and he just scoffed at them, rolling his eyes playfully, a small smile tugging at his lips.

He was glad he took the surgery. He never felt this light in what seemed like forever.

 

 

“So, you almost died. Again.” Hajime stated as Semi relayed the story from the other side of the phone.

“Yes. I almost died. Again.” Semi echoed. Hajime rolled his eyes, aware that Semi can’t see him. “I can almost hear you rolling your eyes at me, Hajime.”

“Shut up.” He grumbled.

“I almost gave in, you know.” Semi said, his voice turning quiet. Hajime stopped midway from bringing the spoon to his lips as he was eating his dinner.

“Almost?”

“Well, when death offers you its comfort, you kind of want to take it and just, rest you know? Sleep forever.”

Hajime was silent for a moment before he spoke again, “What made you not want to take it?”

“Maybe somewhere in the line between life and death, my spirit decided that there are some things worth discovering and fighting for. That life for me isn’t worth giving up just because I didn’t get the love I wanted or yearned for, whatever.”

“Well, I’m glad your spirit doesn’t possess the same stupidity as you.”

“WOW.” Hajime laughed at Semi’s offended tone and he could almost see Semi posing a fake pout with his arms crossed and forehead creased.

Nevertheless, he was glad Semi is fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu @EITADAKIMASU on twitter and come scream with me about haikyuu (chapter 298 is out and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA so much feels gdi)
> 
> thank you for reading!


	7. hopes and new beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From: Hajime (8:45 am)  
> Revenge, asshole.
> 
> To: Hajime (9:03 am)  
> Fuck you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wasn't supposed to upload this until the end of the month but i was talking with my friend earlier, and he got me feeling these feels and i had to open the file of the fic and read it and decide to upload it. i wasn't sure about the ending but i thought about it well and decide that i dont want anymore drama and just give these boys the happiness they truly deserve.
> 
> this is the last chapter of bloom. i am honestly proud i got to finish a multi-chapter fic despite my laziness lol. i'm working on something new, but it might be longer than this and might take a while as i'm still working out on how the story would flow, but i guess it would be angst free. thank you for staying with me until the end. i hope you enjoy the last update. i love you all! 
> 
> btw please do listen to "bloom" by the paper kites. i love the song and it's what inspired this fic.

Eita should’ve known better than to give in to Hajime’s insistence that they have a Godzilla marathon last night, which they did, and finished at around 4 am.

Or maybe Eita should’ve known better than to agree when Hanamaki and Matsukawa asked if they could take their precious kouhais out around Tokyo before the term even started.

Eita should’ve known better, really, but he didn’t, not when he is awake at fucking 8 in the morning, dripping wet because Tendou thought it was nice to wake him up by pouring a glass of water on his head while shouting “Power Smash!”

“What the fuck, Satori?!” He exclaimed as he stood from his bed. Tendou just smiled at him while Hajime was on his side of the room, laughing at Eita’s demise. “You should be glad it’s just a glass of water, not a pail, Eita-kun. Now, off you go and take a bath. We will be late for our wonderful day out.”

Eita begrudgingly took his towel that Hajime was handing him and stormed towards the bathroom.

 

When he went out, Tendou’s gone and his beddings were removed, leaving only his mattress to dry.

He plopped down on Hajime’s bed, his towel covering his face, and he let out a groan.

“Why did we even agree to this?” He asked.

“Because you don’t want Tendou to give out your pictures during your chuuni phase in middle school when you told him last night that you’d rather stay in and sleep rather than go out.” Hajime reminded him and Eita just let out a groan, taking Hajime’s pillow and burying his face in it. “Besides, you told Hanamaki and Matsukawa that it’s fine and it’s not a big deal.”

“What did I do to deserve this.” He mumbled and he heard Hajime laugh before he felt a pat on his knee. “Stop being dramatic and dry your hair. We need to leave before Tendou breaks the door and drags us along.”

“Just let me perish here.”

“Eita.”

“Fine, fine.” He sat up and frowned. Hajime sighed and took it upon himself to dry Eita’s hair because he knows he wouldn’t be doing it anytime soon as long as he was sulking.

In the last 5 months, things have changed.

After they were released from the hospital, they needed a month of bed rest before they were able to attend classes once again. Their doctor issued them medical certificates which they later on emailed to their professors and decided that they might as well take extra subjects on their second year of uni.

The doctor also advised that they wouldn’t be playing volleyball anytime soon, as long as the wound of the surgery isn’t fully healed. In 6 months they could, after they visit their doctors and get a clear that they could play again.

Their first year ended and summer came upon them. Moniwa transferred to an apartment near the campus along with Sasaya and Kamasaki, which left Hajime roommate-less for a while until Eita told him he would be rooming with him when they knew Kawanishi would be studying in their university as well.

_“Are you sure? I could always room with Kenjirou off-campus since he is sharing an apartment with Futakuchi, Yahaba and Kyoutani.” Kawanishi asked as Eita was packing his stuff, with Tendou’s assistance of course, seeing as he cannot strain his body yet._

_“Yeah, don’t worry about it. Hajime told me it’s fine since he’s rooming with nobody now. And it saves you from going to visit Satori here every day and sleeping over almost every night. I’ll be fine. Besides, you wouldn’t want to be an audience to their cuddling and make-out sessions, do you?” Eita assured him._

_“I suppose not. Thank you very much, Semi-san.”_

And thus the current arrangement of Eita and Hajime rooming with one another and Kawanishi taking his place as Tendou’s roommate in his former dorm room.

 

They also went back to Sendai as planned, to visit their respective families and former schools. They also lend out a hand to training their kouhais and Coach Washijo and Coach Irihata were more than grateful. It came as a shock to everyone how they were suddenly best buds when they rivaled each other with so much intensity during their high school days. Well, it WAS high school. Besides, their rivalry was still there, but now it just turned into a friendly one instead of when they were trying to smash each other’s head off when they’re in the court.

“You two aren’t playing?” Coach Washijo asked when he saw Eita and Hajime took their seats on the benches beside him, the match between the current Shiratorizawa team against the Shiratorizawa-Seijoh alumnis starting.

“Nah, we just got out of surgery. 3 more months before we’re allowed to play again. Besides, Oikawa’s there. He can do the work for me.” Eita said, and Washijo just offered a nod, turning back to look at the game, shouting “Tsutomu, look at the ball, ya idiot!”

After the practice match, everyone went out for ice cream before they headed towards the Semi household because when Eita’s mom knew that everyone in their friend group was in Sendai, she didn’t miss the opportunity to invite them over, even going as far as phoning everyone (how she was able to get their contact information, Eita didn’t know) to make sure that they would be coming.

“Hey, mom’s asking you to come over.” Hajime said, nudging Eita by the elbow as they walked towards the Semi household.

“Me? Or Oikawa?” Eita asked.

“You. You’re her new favorite.” Hajime rolled his eyes and Eita just laughed, “Well, what can I say? I’m likeable that way.”

 

That became their routine during their 2-month stay in Sendai. Sometimes, Hajime would go over Eita’s or sometimes the opposite. Sometimes all of them would go out and play in the neighborhood gym while Eita and Hajime sat by the sidelines as scorers or mere spectators, then go get ice cream or ramen after, proceeding to hang-out on whoever’s place was available. There were also days when everyone would just laze around in their own houses, not even exerting the smallest energy to move around or go out. Sometimes Eita would go over to Tendou’s house and they would watch anime along with Ushijima, while Hajime spends his time with Hanamaki, Oikawa and Matsukawa.

But most of the time, it’s only Eita and Hajime, because Tendou would be over at Kawanishi’s to help him pack for university. Oikawa and Ushijima left a month earlier because of their training for the national team. Matsukawa and Hanamaki would be on dates, and both Eita and Hajime refused to be third-wheels to their best friends and their boyfriends.

 

It was during his visits to the Iwaizumi household that Eita came to know of Hajime’s love for Godzilla.

There were posters in his room, a rack full of Godzilla comics and DVDs and on top were his Godzilla figurines.

“I didn’t know you were such a nerd,” He told Hajime, earning him an eye roll from the raven. Eita remembered taking in the interior of Hajime’s room, the cool blue beddings that match the paint of the walls, the calm atmosphere and the photos that hang on a string on one side of the room. It was entirely Hajime and he found himself settling in comfortably.

There was also that one time when Iwaizumi-san invited the Semi family over for dinner, and Hajime’s baby pictures were taken out. Hajime almost bolted towards his room to hide for the rest of the night, (or maybe for the rest of his life, as his dramatic self told Eita), if not for his mother holding him by the arm to stop him.

He had to sit down between his parents and watch in agony while Eita took pictures of his embarrassing (but cute) pictures, ones that only Oikawa knew because they were childhood best friends, and he was in some pictures as well. He almost went out at midnight to go to the Semi household and strangle Eita when he received a text from Hanamaki, Matsukawa and Tendou, an attached picture of him when he was a child with a meme caption.

“I trusted you.” Hajime said through gritted teeth when he called Eita. The pink-haired man just laughed at him. _The nerve._

“Come on, you were cute. I’m simply doing the world a favor and blessing them with your little, adorable and innocent self.”

“You mean giving Hanamaki and Matsukawa, and now even Tendou, teasing material to make me miserable for the rest of my life.” Hajime grumbled and Eita just laughed at him once again.

 

 

“Iwa-chan, why does Wakatoshi have some of our childhood pictures?!” Oikawa asked when he called him.

“Ask Eita.”

“And the ones with dirt all over my face!!”

“Oikawa, even if you roll around the mud, I’m pretty sure Ushiwaka will still love you.”

“But, Iwa-chan!!”

“But what, Shittykawa?”

Oikawa just whined at the other end of the line. He heard another voice, Ushijima’s, telling Oikawa that, _yes, Iwaizumi is right. I love you no matter what, Tooru_. That made Oikawa stop whining and Hajime could practically feel and see Oikawa’s face sparkling.

“The next time you go to Semi-chan’s house, I hope Hanako-san would take out his childhood pictures and I trust you to send them to me, okay Iwa-chan?” Hajime didn’t miss the hidden intent in Oikawa’s sweet tone, and for once, he would agree to whatever his best friend is planning.

True enough, when Hajime visited the Semi household, Hanako-san excitedly pulled out Eita’s childhood pictures, ones that ONLY Tendou had seen, and Eita had stopped him from taking pictures (but Tendou is a sneaky bastard and he managed to take some until Eita caught him). Eita looked almost pale and Hajime had to bite his lip to stop the grin that threatened to appear.

Pulling out his phone with a smug look directed towards the pink-haired boy, he took pictures of Eita’s childhood days, even going as far as seeing the ones his mother had taken during his chuunibyou phase and it was then that Hajime wasn’t able to stop his laugh.

“Oh my god, you were wearing eyeliner!” Hajime said and gripped his stomach as he laughed hard. Eita buried his face in the couch pillow.

“Mom, why did you do this to me?” Eita whined.

His mother just offered a pat on his shoulder, “It’s only fair Eita. You get to make fun of Hajime when we went over at their house. It’s his turn to make fun of you now.”

Hajime continued to browse through his pictures and then they retreated to Eita’s bedroom, where they decided to watch English movies they barely understood.

“So, pretty boy, will you teach me how to put eyeliner?” Hajime asked in the middle of the movie, and Eita groaned and covered himself in his comforter.

The next day, Eita woke up to texts from Hanamaki, Matsukawa and Kamasaki, even Oikawa, of his pictures with a meme caption. Following those texts was Hajime’s.

_From: Hajime (8:45 am)_

_Revenge, asshole._

_To: Hajime (9:03 am)_

_Fuck you._

 

They returned to Tokyo two weeks before the new semester started. Just in time for them to be able to enroll and finish arranging their now shared dorm room.

Tendou went down ahead of them because he was helping Kawanishi to settle in the university. Eita, Hajime, Matsukawa and Hanamaki returned together and the two helped Eita and Hajime in arranging their room before the four of them went out for dinner.

“Hey, Yahaba and the others are asking if we could take them out before the term starts.” Hanamaki informed the two of them. Eita looked at them questioningly, “Yahaba?”

“Yeah, our kouhai. Seijoh’s captain and setter after Oikawa.” Hajime answered.  “Who else is coming?” He asked Hanamaki.

“Kyoutani, Watari, Futakuchi, Shirabu and Kawanishi.” Hanamaki answered. At the mention of Shirabu’s name, they all turned to look at Eita. “What?” He asked as he noticed their stares.

“Shirabu.” Matsukawa simply said.

“Oh. It’s nothing. I can go if all of you would. It’s not a big deal.” _Not anymore._

The three nodded at him and they continued to eat their dinners.

 

That was the reason why Eita found himself awake at 8 am on a weekend, when he could’ve been sleeping in because he was tired from staying up so late that he can barely open his eyes.

“Can we just lock the door and stay in?” Eita grumbled as Hajime dried his hair with the towel.

“Unless you want Tendou making good on his promise and spreading your chuuni pictures around, then no.” Hajime said and Eita just groaned as an answer, leaning his head on Hajime’s stomach. “Come on, your hair’s dry enough.” Hajime said nudging him. Eita looked up at him with a frown.

“Lighten up, Eita. I’m going to buy you eyeliner.” Hajime teased. Eita’s frown deepened and he huffed while standing up.

Hajime took his keys from his side table and they both went out of their room.

 

They were having their lunch in Shibuya and Eita was already considering going back to the dorms. Yahaba and Shirabu kept on arguing non-stop. If not Shirabu, then it’s Kyoutani that Yahaba is arguing with. Hanamaki and Matsukawa were not even stopping them, instead they were filming them with amused expressions.

“For future purposes.” Hanamaki said when Eita gave him a look that clearly says, ‘What the fuck?’

“Future purposes.” Eita deadpanned.

“You never know, Semisemi. We could be YouTubers!” Tendou exclaimed happily.

“Bro, that sounds so cool. The three of us are gonna be the best meme trio ever.” Matsukawa said. Eita just buried his face on his hand and groaned. “Can we all just eat in peace?”

Tendou, seeming to pick up Eita’s sour mood, gestured for the others to stop.

“He lacks sleep and it’s my fault for keeping him up, that’s why he’s prickly. Just tone down the noise, yeah?” Hajime explained to them when they looked at Eita’s hunched over form.

“Why? What did you do last night, Iwaizumi-san?” Futakuchi asked with a teasing tone, earning him a glare from the raven. “Futakuchi.”

“Yes, dad. Sorry, dad.” Futakuchi said.

“What the fuck.” Hajime deadpanned, and everyone snickered, he even heard a snort from Eita who was sitting beside him.

Their orders came and Eita sat up properly. He was thankful that everyone was too hungry to even bicker over food.

He looked across him, and saw Futakuchi and Shirabu, subtly feeding one another to taste each other’s food. It was domestic and it was cute, and where there came an ache within Eita from before, coupled with yearning for Shirabu, there was just an empty void waiting to be filled. He is happy for what Shirabu has, even proud as a senpai, and he would always be. It’s just that now, it feels so much nicer to be sincerely happy for him without the threat of flowers spilling from his mouth.

Shirabu raised his head and he met Eita’s eyes. Eita remembered loving those eyes because it was beautiful and expressive. He remembered drowning in them.

Now it was just a pair of copper-brown eyes, and Eita can look at them without struggling to breath.

Shirabu furrowed his eyebrows, and Eita answered his look with a raised eyebrow, prompting an eye roll from the younger boy before he returned to his food.

Hajime placed a hand on Eita’s knee, and the latter looked at him. Concern was written in Hajime’s feartures, maybe he saw the little interaction between Shirabu and Eita.

‘Are you okay?’ He mouthed. Eita just smiled at squeezed the hand on his knee, _I am, don’t worry._ Hajime just looked at him, before breaking off into a smile and then he continued eating. If anyone noticed the exchange, no one said anything about it.

 

It seems that Hanamaki and Matsukawa found Shirabu and Yahaba interesting enough that they would subtly pull jokes and harmless pranks on them. Tendou would be standing by to take videos and Kawanishi would quietly walk beside him, sometimes whispering to Watari as they offer input on how Hanamaki and Matsukawa could play tricks on Shirabu and Yahaba. Kyoutani tried his best to stay out of their way, standing beside Eita and Hajime the whole time, and Futakuchi tried to keep himself safe by teaming up with Kawanishi and Watari. 

Moniwa, Sasaya and Kamasaki met them in Tokyo Skytree as they all agreed on last night.

“Geh, Kamasaki-san.” Futakuchi said with mock disdain. Kamasaki just rolled his eyes at his kouhai and walked on ahead of the group, Sasaya and Moniwa following behind.

“Is he okay?” Hajime whispered. Eita just shrugged. “Who knows.”

When they entered the Skytree, Moniwa was already holding their tickets and handing them out one by one.

“Is Kamasaki okay?” Hajime asked when Moniwa handed him his ticket.

“He’s fine. It’s just that, it is the first time he saw Futakuchi after what happened with him, you know, with the Hanahaki. He doesn’t know how to approach him yet.” Moniwa explained.

“Are the three of you doing well?” Eita asked as he walked on the other side of Moniwa.

“Yeah. We are. Thank you, by the way, for helping Kamasaki out.”

“It’s no problem. I’m glad he’s happy with the two of you. He deserves it after what happened.” Eita said and smiled at Moniwa, who looked behind him and saw Kamasaki and Sasaya whispering closely to each other and laughing softly. “I’m glad, too.”

Hajime met Eita’s eyes, and he gestured that they walk ahead as Moniwa stood waiting for Kamasaki and Sasaya to catch up to him.

 

 

They went up to the 350th floor and Eita slowly walked around, taking in every side of Tokyo he could see from the Skytree. At a spot with few people, he stopped and just leaned against the railing, looking out towards the Tokyo skyline as the afternoon went by. He felt someone stand beside him and he slightly turned to see Hajime leaning against the railing as well.

“Where are the others?” He asked.

“They went up the 450th floor.” Hajime answered. Eita hummed in reply and turned back to look at the scenery before him.

“Hey.” Hajime nudged him.

“Hmm?”

“I want to try something.”

Curious, Eita turned to look at Hajime once again, eyebrow raised in question. “What is it?”

It happened so fast that Eita wasn’t able to keep track. One second, they were just looking at each other, olive green eyes meeting chocolate-brown, and then the next, Hajime’s lips was on his, soft and careful. It was more than the answer that Eita was searching for.

They separated instantly and Eita blinked then he smiled gently, “Well, that was nice.”

“Is it?” Hajime whispered, lips quirking up in a smile. Eita just laughed and looked around, before his lips were on Hajime’s once again, and the raven sighed in content, eyes closing. It was chaste, just the feel of soft lips pressing against each other, before they pulled away, mindful that they were in a public space despite there being not too many people.

Wide smiles painted their lips and there was even a hint of scarlet on Hajime’s ears. Eita leaned his forehead against Hajime’s shoulder and let out a content hum.

The peaceful moment was broken when they heard Yahaba’s and Shirabu’s loud voices echoing down the hallway where they stood. Eita straightened up and looked towards where the sound came. Hanamaki and Matsukawa appeared, along with Tendou who was running from Shirabu and decided to hide behind Eita when he saw him.

“Eita-kun, save me!!” Tendou screeched when Shirabu tried to reach behind Eita to get ahold of Tendou. Yahaba was behind him, laughing at the whole ordeal and kept on teasing Shirabu because of his height.

“Tendou-san, give me back my phone!” Shirabu said.

Eita just sighed and walked away from them, following the rest of the group as they waited for the elevators to bring them down to the lobby.

Hajime stood beside him as they waited, and smiled at him before linking their pinkies together. Eita smiled back before taking Hajime’s hand in his and interlacing their fingers.

Eita was nervous, but it was the good kind of nervous. The kind of nervous where your heart beats so fast it threatens to jump out of your chest. The kind of nervous that makes you feel all tingly and mushy inside. The kind of nervous that sends butterflies dancing in your stomach. Eita was nervous, the last one didn’t end up well for him after all, but despite that, Eita can’t help himself from smiling.

He wasn’t afraid. After all, you would miss everything that’s beautiful in life when you let fear eat you up. Eita didn’t want to miss it, whether this was just some affection passing by, or this was something that would last a long time. Eita didn’t want to miss it, the way the light of the sunset kissed Hajime’s skin. It was beautiful, Hajime is beautiful. If he had his camera, he would’ve captured the moment already and maybe frame it and hang it up the wall in their dorm room.

 _Hajime._ Eita wondered when ‘Semi and Iwaizumi’ became ‘Eita and Hajime’ because that’s what it is now, and he hopes it would be for a long time.

Their elevator ride came and they all boarded together. Eita was so caught up in Hajime, that he didn’t notice Kawanishi and Tendou whispering beside him, or Yahaba and Shirabu handing money to Hanamaki and Matsukawa, who were grinning triumphantly.

 

The wind greeted them as they stepped out of Tokyo Skytree. It was turning warm, with the spring season making way for summer. The last of the cherry blossoms fell, but hope continues to bloom in Eita’s heart. Of a new beginning, and a better future, after all, some wonderful things in life are born after one experiences darkness, just as when a beautiful rainbow appears after the rain.

This was Eita and Hajime’s rainbow after their own storms, and they both hope that this time, it was worth it.

 

*** extra ***

 

_Hanameme added Matsumeme, Yahoeba, Shirabitch, Kyouken, Futagorgeous, Watariiii, alienkawa, ushiwakawaka, miracleboi, kawa_taichi, moniwa, sasaYAAAA and YASushi to the group._

_Matsumeme named the group “dem bitchez”_

_Hanameme sent a photo._

_Matsumeme sent a photo._

Matsumeme: I would like to announce that our dearest Iwaizumi and Semi are already dating.

Futagorgeous: CALLED IT

Shirabitch: shut up, kenji

miracleboi: now now kenjirou, stop being salty about losing the bet.

Shirabitch: whatever

Yahoeba: yeah, Shirabitch. Stop being salty.

Shirabitch: you lost the bet too, you asshole.

Yahoeba: I’m not being salty about it.

kyouken: you’ve been whining about losing 4000 yen since a while ago, shigeru

Yahoeba: I hate you

kyouken: im sure u dont

alienkawa: OMG

alienkawa: THEY’RE SO CUUUUUTE

ushiwakawaka: You’re cuter, Tooru.

alienkawa: wakatoshiiii, have I ever told u how much I love u

ushiwakawaka: Every day.

alienkawa: I love you

ushiwakawaka: I love you, too.

ushiwakawaka: Tell Semi and Iwaizumi my best wishes to their new relationship.

Shirabitch: that was…

Yahoeba: Disgustingly cute.

Hanameme: Issei, babe, since when did Oikawa outgay us?

alienkawa: I have always outgayed u bitches

alienkawa: I am the supreme and the absolute, oikawa-sama

Yahoeba: Whatever

alienkawa: RUDE YAHABA-CHAN

Matsumeme: lol, I am going to meme u later hiro ;)

Hanameme: talk meme to me babe ;)

Shirabitch: what does that even mean

Hanameme: it means what it means, shirabu.

Matsumeme: anyway

Matsumeme: i just sent the photo to Kaori-san.

miracleboi: lmao I also sent it to Hanako-san.

miracleboi: she called me and she screamed, then she told me she would be calling eita-kun and ended the call immediately

 

\-----

 

Eita’s phone started ringing. He saw his mother’s name on the display screen, and Hajime quickly paused the movie they were watching as Eita answered the call.

“Hello mom?”

“SEMI EITA”

“Yes?”

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?!?!?!”

“Tell you about what?”

“THAT YOU AND HAJIME-KUN ARE ALREADY DATING!!” Eita’s eyes widened and he turned to look at Hajime who was frowning at his cellphone.

“How did you know?”

“SATORI-KUN SENT ME A PHOTO OF THE TWO OF YOU KISSING IN THE SKYTREE. IT’S SO ROMANTIC”

Eita knew whose head he would have the next day.

“We just established the relationship a while ago, mom.”

“WHATEVER. I’m happy for you, Eita. I hope it goes well this time around.” His mother said with so much sincerity, it made him smile.

“Thank you, mom. I hope so, too.”

“Okay, I called to scream because of that. I know you’re cuddling with Hajime-kun, continue what you’re doing. And please, Eita, practice safe sex okay?”

“MOM!” Eita exclaimed. His mother just laughed at him and ended the call, making Eita sigh heavily and massage his forehead. He turned to look at Hajime whose frown deepened as he was typing on his own phone. He scooted closer and placed his chin on the raven’s shoulder, “What’s up?”

“Kyoutani added me to a group chat with the others.”

 

**_Chat: dem bitchez (Hanameme, Matsumeme, Yahoeba, Shirabitch, Kyouken, Futagorgeous, Watariiii, alienkawa, ushiwakawaka, miracleboi, kawa_taichi, moniwa, sasaYAAAA and YASushi)_ **

_Kyouken added iwaizumihajime to the group._

Hanameme: o shit

Matsumeme: abort abort

_Hanameme left the group._

_Matsumeme left the group._

Watariiii: LMAO

_Watariiii added Matsumeme to the group._

_Watariiii added Hanumeme to the group._

iwaizumihajime: what the fuck is this

Hanameme: kyoutani why

Matsumeme: watari why

Watariiii: O:)

iwaizumihajime: you took photos of us kissing a while ago

Matsumeme: well everyone saw it coming after the surgery

Matsumeme: I mean you two were practically inseparable from each other

Hanameme: and you gaze at each other with this kind of ‘look’ and it’s actually real fucking cute

iwaizumihajime: YOU EVEN MADE BETS ABOUT US GETTING TOGETHER

Matsumeme: well, as I said, everyone already saw it coming

Shirabitch: hanamaki-san and matsukawa-san started it

Matsumeme: BUT YOU JOINED

Yahoeba: You pressured us into joining.

Hanameme: WE DID NOT

Shirabitch: you so did.

Hanameme: IWAIZUMI DON’T BELIEVE THEM

iwaizumihajime: whatever

Matsumeme: does whatever mean we’re safe

miracleboi: EITA AIS KNCKING AT NMY DOOR AND HE SI CALLIGN TOUT MY NAEM BBUT HE ISN;T SHOUTNG

Futagorgeous: why are u in panic mode

miracleboi: U DONR UNDESTND

miracleboi: THS IS THE CAKM BEFOR EHT ESTORMM

miracleboi: IN CASE THAT I DIE TDAY PLS TELL TAICHI TAHT I LOVE HIMS OSO MCH

miracleboi: AND THAT HE KNOWS THE PASSWROD TO MY PHOEN AND AHBDHDBASD---

Futagorgeous: oh my god

Futagorgeous: is he okay

Shirabitch: lol he’ll live

kawa_taichi: semi-san got in and he now has satori in a headlock

_kawa_taichi sent a photo._

Matsumeme: oh my god

Matsumeme: hiro he is just like iwaizumi

Hanameme: i suddenly felt afraid with my own life

Yahoeba: I hope Semi-san and Iwaizumi-san get both of you in a chokehold.

Hanameme: you’re so mean, yahaba. :(

moniwa: Well, it’s your fault for starting a bet about them getting together

Hanameme: :( moniwaaa not u too

moniwa: Anyway. Congratulations, Iwaizumi and Semi! From Yasushi, Takehito and I.

iwaizumihajime: thank you, moniwa.

iwaizumihajime: and thank you, ushiwaka.

iwaizumihajime: also kyoutani

kyouken: you’re welcome iwaizumi-san

Matsumeme: are we still in trouble

iwaizumihajime: you’re lucky the shot was beautiful

Hanameme: soooo?

iwaizumihajime: just send me the goddamn picture

_iwaizumihajime left the group._

Hanameme: are we saved

Matsumeme: let’s just send the picture and pray that we would still be alive tomorrow


End file.
